Match People with Their Nursery Rhyme Problems Quiz

Answer: Unnamed "old woman"

Apparently everyone recognized the old woman who lived in a shoe, so she needed no name, but somebody should call Child Protective Services and get better living conditions for her children. According to the rhyme:
"She had so many children, she didn't know what to do;
She gave them some broth without any bread;
Then whipped them all soundly and put them to bed."

Answer: Just "Jack" alone

Jack's mother said, "I don't care if all the other children are jumping over candlesticks. That's just too dangerous and you're not allowed." But they talked him into doing it. And the worst part is, nothing bad happened, so he's going to think he can get away with any foolish thing and never be hurt.

Answer: Jack and Jill

These two children, Jack and Jill, go for water every day, at least once, maybe more times. In the days before running water, it was a simple household task, like taking out the trash or getting the mail. It shouldn't cause a horrible injury like a fractured skull.

Answer: Mary

So I said to Mary, "I'm glad to see a young lady enjoying a nice hobby like flower gardening, but flowers do have standard names. These 'silver bells' are pretty bulbs you planted and that's right, but what you're calling 'cockle shells' really aren't called that at all, and the same for your 'pretty maids.'" Do you know what Mary said to me? She said, "I don't care. I'll call them what I want." She's just that way."

Answer: Humpty Dumpty

You men, and certainly you horses, shouldn't feel guilty about this. Humpty Dumpty surely knew he was more at risk of fatal injury than others. He should have realized that even a short fall from that wall would have killed him and it would be impossible to restore him.

Answer: Georgie Porgie

If girls cry when you kiss them, it means they don't want you to kiss them. No excuses, no explanations. You stop kissing them unless they make it perfectly clear they want you to continue. This isn't rocket science. Everybody else here can figure it out.

Answer: Mouse (just one)

If the mouse in "Hickory Dickory Dock" was scared enough to run back down the clock when it struck one, imagine how scared he would be at noon. Or really, any other time. Surely, the mouse had heard the clock strike just from being in the area. You'd think he wouldn't climb it at all, if he didn't like the noise.

Answer: Three mice

I called them just "three mice", because that's what they prefer. They dislike having attention drawn to their visual handicap, especially because they can do what other mice do, like scare farmers' wives and chase them. I hate to tell them that people are calling them the "three no-tail mice" behind their backs now.

But honestly, making a woman panic while she was holding a kitchen knife--didn't they see what was coming? I mean, didn't they, um, never mind. I'll go now...

Answer: Black sheep

I'm surprised how well the Black Sheep can estimate the volume of his own wool before it's shorn. When I go to the barber for a haircut, I couldn't guess how many sandwich bags full of hair he'd cut off. I suppose a sheep pays more attention to these things, because he makes money from it, but knowing he'll have exactly three bags is still pretty amazing.

Answer: Jack Sprat

Jack Sprat and his wife could be arguing because they like different things. He's on a low-fat diet, while she's the lucky type who never gains weight and likes to eat fatty bacon and ham. They could argue about it. But instead, they buy the fatty cuts of meat and spend a little time trimming them. Both get what they want. That's a good attitude, much better than the way the old woman in the shoe handles her family problems.