Impossible Questions on TV Theme Music Quiz

Answer: "The Fishin' Hole"

"Mayberry March" was the theme to "Mayberry R.F.D" (a spin-off of "Andy Griffith"). "The Toy Parade" was the theme song to "Leave It to Beaver" (1957-63), while "Movin' on Up" was sung during the opening credits to "The Jeffersons" (1975-85).

"The Andy Griffith Show" was a gentle sitcom about the sheriff of fictional Mayberry, North Carolina and all the quirky characters who lived there. In its last season it was #1 in the Nielsen ratings. Earle Hagen and Herbert Spencer wrote the music to "The Fishin' Hole". The man whistling during the opening credits was Fred Lowery. Although not heard on the TV program, "The Fishin' Hole" did have lyrics written by Everett Sloane and recorded by Andy Griffith:

"Well now, take down your fishing pole and meet me at the fishing hole
We may not get a bite all day but don't you rush away
What a great place to rest your bones and mighty fine for skipping stones
You'll feel fresh as a lemonade a-setting in the shade

Whether it's hot, whether it's cool
Oh what a spot for whistling like a fool

What a fine day to take a stroll and wind up at the fishing hole
I can't think of a better way to pass the time of day!"

Answer: "Funeral March of a Marionette"

"Alfred Hitchcock Presents" was an anthology series in the horror/suspense genre featuring stories directed by Alfred Hitchcock. Many stories had a bizarre or darkly humorous twist to them, as befitting the man who directed "Notorious" and other classic films.

The charming "Funeral March of a Marionette" was originally a short piece for solo piano written by Charles Gounod (1818-93). Gounod intended the march to be one of the movements of a Suite Burlesque (meaning parody or comic exaggeration, not striptease!), but he never got around to finishing it. For "Alfred Hitchcock Presents" (1955-1965), the march was arranged for full orchestra.

When the program was revived in the 1980s, the "Funeral March", in a livelier arrangement, was used again.

Answer: "Park Avenue Beat"

Manhattan-born Fred Steiner composed "Park Avenue Beat" and also much of the incidental music throughout the series. He also composed the theme music for the "The Bullwinkle Show" (1959-1964) beginning with season 3, and he contributed to many episodes of "Star Trek" (1966-69), "The Twilight Zone" (1959-1964), and "Lost in Space" (1965-67). His movie credits include "The Greatest Story Ever Told" (1965) and "Star Trek: The Motion Picture" (1979). In 2005, the "Milwaukee Journal Sentinel" called "Park Avenue Beat" one of the most recognizable TV themes ever (although it's name is more obscure). For the made-for-TV movies reviving Perry Mason (1985-1995), Dirk DeBenedectis re-orchestrated and re-recorded the theme music.

By the way, "Old Trail" by Rex Koury and Glenn Spencer opened up "Gunsmoke" on radio (1952-61) and television (1955-75), and "Sunny Day" has opened "Sesame Street" since 1969. "The Marseillaise" is the national anthem of France.

Answer: "The Bugs Bunny Show"

If you are older than dirt -- or a cartoon über-nerd -- you know that the original name was "The Bugs Bunny Show". In fact, the last lines, which were apparently only shown at the end of the program in the 1960s and 1970s (and maybe the 1980s?), were "This is the Bugs Bunny SHOW" in a very old-fashioned four-part harmony.

The show began in 1960 as a half-hour primetime program on ABC. Then in 1962 it moved to Saturday mornings on CBS and combined with CBS's "The Road Runner Show" to form "The Bugs Bunny/Road Runner Hour". It switched back and forth between ABC and CBS many times (with lengths varying 30-90 minutes) during the 1970s until it settled at CBS as "The Bugs Bunny/Road Runner Show". In 1985, however, ABC broadcast it as "The Bugs Bunny/Looney Tunes Comedy Hour", and then later "The Bugs Bunny & Tweety Show", with more format fiddling. In 2000, Warner Bros. gave exclusive rights to its library to the Cartoon Network, and at long last Bugs Bunny's producers, recycling cartoons older than some of the viewers' parents, ended the rabbit's forty-year presence on American network broadcasting.

The theme "This Is It" was written by Jerry Livingston and Mack David. "And oh, what heights we'll hit! On with the show, this is it!"

Answer: False

Huh? Why is it known as "Nadia's Theme" then? Here is the story:

Barry De Vorzon and Perry Botkin, Jr. wrote "Cotton's Dream", the original title of the piece, for the movie "Bless the Beasts and Children" (1971), starring a teenaged Bill Mumy (Will Robinson from the 1960s "Lost in Space" TV series). Botkin rearranged the music and it became the theme music for "The Young and the Restless" when the daytime drama premiered on CBS in 1973 (and was covered by Sounds of Sunshine in a 1974 soundtrack album). In 1976, ABC's "Wide World of Sports" played "Cotton's Dream" during a sequence of highlights of Comaneci's Olympic performance. Comaneci herself NEVER competed to "Cotton's Dream"; nonetheless after the ABC broadcast it forever became known as "Nadia's Theme". In fact, a single released in 1976 called "Nadia's Theme (The Young and the Restless)" reached #8 on the Billboard Hot 100.

Answer: "Murder, She Wrote"

The theme music, unofficially designated as J.B. Fletcher's theme, was composed by John Addison. "Murder, She Wrote" (1984-1996) starred Angela Lansbury as the matronly yet (as the series progressed) sophisticated and wise widow-turned-mystery-writer and polymath Jessica "J.B." Fletcher from fictional Cabot Cove, Maine. With her observational skills and wide learning, she generally solved mysteries better than the police, who regarded her initially either with skepticism or with admiration, depending on their taste in books!

Answer: Theremin

The theremin is played moving the hands near, but never touching, the instrument's antennae. It gives a campy eeriness well suited to "Midsomer Murders", a long-running ITV series that began airing in 1997, based in a peculiar fictional county full of villages with quirky names, idiosyncratic inhabitants, and bizarre murders. In fact the murder rate for Midsomer County, as observed by the characters on the show, is about double London's!

In the original pilot for "Lost in Space" (which remained unaired until the turn of the 21st century), the theme music (which was NOTHING like the John Williams composition that played in the regular series) was performed entirely with a theremin.

Answer: Latin

Rowan Atkinson plays the title role. It's a quirky comedy, with very little dialogue, about a socially challenged man who gets into all kinds of scrapes because he tries to take shortcuts, to pinch pennies, or to be more clever than the next fellow. In one episode, he jumped ahead of the wait at the dentist's office by pouring water into the lap of a child - making it look like the boy had soiled himself! The Choir of Southwark Cathedral (or sometimes Christ Church Cathedral, Oxford) sings Latin not only during the credits but also in the transition between parts 1 and 2 of each episode. Here is what they sing, if you have ever wondered:

Opening credits: "Ecce homo qui est faba." (Behold the man who is a bean)
End of part 1: "Finis partis primae." (The end of the first part)
Beginning of part 2: "Pars secunda." (The second part)
Closing credits: "Vale homo qui est faba." (Farewell to the man who is a bean)

Answer: It is written in an unconventional meter (rhythm)

Composed by Lalo Schifrin, the "M:I" main title is one of the most recognizable theme songs, in part because of its unconventional meter. Nearly every original theme song for American TV shows is written in a duple or quadruple meter (ONE-two, ONE-two, or ONE-two-three-four) and occasionally triple (the ONE-two-three waltz meter), but Schifrin composed the "M:I" theme in a rather eccentric quintuple meter: ONE-two-three-four-five, ONE-two-three-four-five. Actually, it's even more complex than that with Schifrin's syncopation, hard to reproduce here: ONE (two) AND-three four five. Lost yet? Schifrin joked that he wrote the main title that way "for people who have five legs".

Released as a single in 1967, the piece reached #41 in the Billboard Hot 100 and #19 in Billboard's Adult Contemporary chart. Originally from Argentina, Schifrin also composed the theme music for the TV series "Planet of the Apes" (1974) and "Starsky and Hutch" (1975-79). "Mission: Impossible" was innovative in many other ways with its ensemble cast, the strength of its incidental music (also by Schifrin), and its long scenes of no dialogue but complicated construction of equipment, costume changes, and all the technical aspects of carrying out a long con against the targeted individual.

Answer: "Star Trek" (1966-1969)

Alexander Courage wrote the theme tune to "Star Trek". A flute, an organ, and a soprano named Loulie Jean Norman vocalized the melody line (wordlessly) over a full orchestra. The very beginning (when William Shatner speaks in voiceover, "Space, the final frontier"), was an homage to Mahler's "First Symphony", and you can also hear motifs of symphonies of Anton Bruckner early on. Unbeknownst to Courage, Gene Roddenberry, the creator of "Star Trek", wrote lyrics, never recorded or used on the series. Why? So that he could claim half the performance royalties. The details of this deviousness are spelled out at the Snopes website.

The theme from the movie "M*A*S*H" (1970), entitled "Suicide Is Painless", definitely was written with lyrics originally, but these were not sung during the TV series. "Bonanza" had lyrics written for its opening theme from the beginning, but it was decided that they were too corny, and so they were never used in the series, although you may find deleted scenes of the Cartwright boys singing them. (Player art_fleming notes that the cast would sometimes sing these lyrics on variety shows). "Fantasy Island" NEVER had lyrics.