"Modern Family" - "My Funky Valentine" Quiz

Answer: A large portrait made from a photograph of the two of them

Phil always takes Claire to Fortelli's Family Style Italian Restaurant for Valentine's Day. Phil now feels he has to up the ante with Claire and suggests getting a hotel room for the evening.

Answer: David Brenner

Jay gives Gloria tickets for them to see David Brenner, whom Gloria has never heard of. Jay explains that he was on Johnny Carson a hundreds times, and Gloria asks who Johnny Carson is.

Answer: Salsa

Gloria has no interest in seeing a comedian, especially one she's never heard of or doesn't use a mallet.

Answer: Lionel Barfield, a Secret Service Agent doing fieldwork prior to the President's arrival

As Phil makes each ridiculous suggestion, Claire gets more and more reluctant to go through with the scenario.

Answer: Great Shakes

Manny writes a poem to Fiona that tells her to meet him at Great Shakes on Valentine night, but Ted Dirkaz, who takes credit for the poem, will be there instead. Manny rhymes Great Shakes with "Great Lakes" in his poem.

Answer: Treat it gently

Cam convinces Mitchell and Manny to go to Great Shakes and help Manny win back Fiona Gunderson from Ted Dirkas. At the restaurant, Mitchell comes to Manny's defense and uses the closing argument that he was denied earlier in the day (after his client settled) on Dirkas.

When Fiona still wants Dirkas instead of Manny, Manny says "This chick is crazy" and he, Cam, Mitchell, and Lily depart the restaurant.

Answer: Clive and Julianna

Phil is wearing a nametag that says his alias is Clive. Claire asks if he's in for a convention or does he forget his name a lot.

Answer: "Oh, jackpot"

Claire lets Phil have a redo after he heads down the path that his wife is always tired and makes endless lists for him to do. Claire is much more pleased with his second attempt.

Answer: Because she is naked underneath the coat

Claire excuses herself from Phil at the bar and she goes and removes all of her clothes and returns to the bar dressed only in her coat. As she and Phil are going upstairs to the hotel room, the belt gets caught in the escalator and Claire is horrified, especially when people she and Phil know recognize them.

Answer: Gloria

Jay and Gloria leave the David Brenner show after David Brenner starts giving Jay the business about having such a young wife. Jay decides to take Gloria salsa dancing after all. As they are leaving the hotel where the show is taking place, they run into Phil and Claire who are still on the escalator. Once Jay joking guesses that Claire is naked under her coat, Gloria comes to her rescue by using her body and her own coat as a shield for Claire to get out of the coat stuck in the escalator with (most) of her dignity still intact.