"The D.E.N.N.I.S. System" (Season 5) Quiz

Answer: Demonstrate your value

"The D.E.N.N.I.S. System" is a comprehensive approach to seduction that Dennis has perfected over the years. According to him, "The first step to any erotic conquest is to D - demonstrate your value". In this episode, he demonstrates his value to Kayleigh, a cute pharmacist, by filling a prescription he forged for his grandmother, to show that he is an "all-around great guy".

Answer: By fixing her sink

Charlie breaks into the waitress' apartment and stuffs hair down her sink so he would have a reason to fix it, thus demonstrating his value. Eventually, the waitress walks in on Charlie doing this and threatens to call the police. This is when Charlie finds out that she had gotten a second job, working at the fair.

Answer: Engage her physically

Dennis says that after you have demonstrated your value, you need to ask her out on a date and engage her physically. Dennis says he tries to engage the girl physically without ever going on a date, which to him is just a waste of time and money.

Answer: Nurturing dependence

Dennis says that once you sleep with a girl for the first time she will naturally start to depend on you. He says that this dependence should be nurtured. In order to do this he suggests to have her car towed, slash her tires, or, his personal "go-to", create a fictional angry neighbor threatening her and tell her that you will "take care of him". Either way, he says that you need to make her depend on you, whether it be for rides or protection.

Answer: Frank and Mac

Mac is at the pharmacy because he is trying to "swoop in on Dennis' chick" because he has his own system called "the M.A.C.", which stands for "Move-in After Completion". Frank is there because he has a system where he moves in after Mac for "the scraps". He showed up at the pharmacy in an attempt to impress Kayleigh with his Magnum prophylactics and wad of 100's.

Answer: Ben

Ben is the soldier who is a recurring character on "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia". The gang tells Dee that she is probably being "D.E.N.N.I.S"'ed by Ben, which causes her to be very suspicious of him. When he takes her to a picnic he set up, she says that he brought her to the middle of nowhere so that she would have to depend on him for a ride back. So she ends up walking back to the city alone through the forest.

Answer: Gladys

Dennis pays Gladys to pose as his fictional sick grandmother because Kayleigh thinks she doesn't exist, because the prescription Dennis forged was written by a doctor named Dr. Toboggan, who doesn't exist. When Dennis runs into Kayleigh with Mac at the fair, Gladys announces that her grandmother was a lesbian and had an affair with Susan B. Anthony.

Answer: Speed pitch

At the fair, Charlie tries to demonstrate his value to the waitress again, this time by "firing off a wicked-hot fastball". When it shows him throw, the waitress says that it was only fifteen miles per hour, and Charlie says it was because his arm is sore.

Answer: Key

Charlie had paid the "carny" to try to stab the waitress, but he stabs Dee while she was flirting with him to get Ben jealous. Charlie wanted him to try to stab the waitress so he could defend her from the stabbing. When Dennis hears this plan he says that it is all wrong; according to him, Charlie should let her get stabbed, and hope that it hits a main artery so that she has to depend on him to nurse her back to health.

Answer: False

Caylee ends up leaving with Ben, who had his face painted like a lizard, because he left Dee at the fair because he says that she is a "mean person". Also, I didn't mention the remaining "N.I.S." of "The D.E.N.N.I.S. System", which is as follows: The second "N" stands for "Neglect emotionally", the "I" stands for "Inspire hope", and the "S" stands for "Separate entirely".