Weekly World News Trivia Quiz

Answer: The National Enquirer

American Media publishes a wide portfolio of magazines (such as "Men's Fitness") as well as most of the weekly tabloids in American supermarket checkouts ("The National Enquirer," "Star," "Sun," and "The Globe," to name a few). Most of their tabloids (including "The National Enquirer") focus on celebrity photos and stories; "Sun" and "Weekly World News" provide more general fare. None of these tabloid publications observe particularly high standards of fact-checking or taste.

In addition to its tabloids, American Media is known for having been a target of the Fall 2001 American anthrax attacks. Innocent-looking envelopes, filled with anthrax by an unknown person, were mailed from Trenton, New Jersey to various media outlets and to two Democratic senators. Five people died; the first of them was Robert Stevens, a "Sun" photo editor who worked at American Media's Boca Raton headquarters. Two Washington, D.C. postal workers and two residents of the New York area also perished; it is not known how the latter victims were exposed.

Answer: They were black and white.

From its founding in 1926 until the new presses arrived in 1979, "The National Enquirer" was printed in black and white. As the seventies ended, however, its publishers decided that the tabloid needed a more eye-catching appearance. Yellow journalism was finally going to get some color! This left the old, perfectly good black-and-white presses available for some other use; after what one imagines was a very short (and possibly drunken) brainstorming session, "Weekly World News" was born.

Answer: Eddie Clontz

Eddie Clontz, who died in 2004, came to "Weekly World News" from a legitimate newspaper, but didn't take long to get used to yellow journalism. Introducing regular columns that ranged from the hilarious to the insulting (most often both), he separated his newspaper from its competitors and saw its popularity (over a million buyers in a decent week) soar.

He both encouraged and enforced a creative approach to reporting; his obituary in "The Economist" recounts that he used to spray writers with a water gun to "urg[e] them to greater imaginative heights."

Answer: Ed Anger

Ed Anger's column ran from 1979 until the end of the magazine; at least four writers, including Eddie Clontz (Question 3) had a turn at the choleric columnist. His most popular columns were published in a 1996 collection: "Let's Pave the Stupid Rainforests and Give School Teachers Stun Guns (And Other Ways to Save America)."

Anger provided more continuity than many of the regular columnists in "Weekly World News." "Dear Dotti" (an advice column that specialized in mocking its readers) was replaced in 2005 by the somewhat kinder column "Hi Dolly"; at the same time, the paper's original two psychics were suddenly ousted. (I wonder if they saw that one coming ...)

Answer: Hillary Clinton

"Hillary Clinton Adopts Alien Baby!" screamed the cover. "Space creature survived UFO crash in Arkansas! Secret Service building special nursery in White House!" And there it was, the "official picture": a pleased-looking First Lady cradling a child with a generic, high-domed alien head. (Strangely, the child seems to have dropped off the radar screen during Clinton's subsequent political career, as a New York senator and 2008 presidential candidate.)

Bob Lind, a "Weekly World News" reporter, told "The Washington Post" about the story's aftermath: "We got a letter, and it said: 'Do you think we're so stupid that we believe that's Hillary holding that alien baby? Hillary's too cold to adopt an alien baby. You put her face on somebody else's picture.' So you realize that this person accepted the idea of an alien baby being found, and that somebody was holding it, but she couldn't believe it was Hillary."

As the undisputed leader in strange-politician-adoption news, "Weekly World News" was also the first (and, unaccountably, the only) paper to announce the 2003 adoption of a shaved ape baby by Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden.

Answer: Colorado, USA

One of many religiously themed articles with extremely strange premises, this report also noted that "U.S. grows new tree from seed," but did not explain why it would wish to do so. Alert "Weekly World News" reporters also, at various points, discovered the face of Satan in photographs from the September 11 attacks -- and revealed the existence of a new prophet with the banner headline "Baby Parts Lake Michigan!" Despite its Judeo-Christian focus, "Weekly World News" (and its competitor, "Sun") also borrowed popular ideas from other religions -- especially reincarnation. "Reincarnation shocker -- Poor girls commit suicide to come back as rich ones!" ran one charming headline from September 1993. And I will never forget the early 1990s "Sun" headline: "My Cat Is a Reincarnation of Hitler!" (The photograph showed a disgruntled-looking white feline with a small mustache drawn on.)

Francophiles will be saddened by the other cover headline of the "Garden of Eden" issue: "Termites Eat the Eiffel Tower!"

Answer: "Bat Boy: The Musical," an off-Broadway show

The three incorrect choices exist only in the troubled mind of yours truly, but "Bat Boy: The Musical" has been performed around the world. Written by Brian Flemming and Keythe Farley, with music and lyrics by Laurence O'Keefe, this tragicomic musical premiered in 1997 and enjoyed cult success. The story takes numerous liberties with the reporting of "Weekly World News," but the original Bat Boy cover appears in the posters. That issue also turns up in the Bruce Willis film "Twelve Monkeys."

Bat Boy himself was a recurring cover character in the publication that created him. He has, as reported by "Weekly World News," used his cave expertise to assist in the hunts for Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden; bitten Santa Claus; and enrolled in a liberal arts college under a false name. Poor Bat Boy -- studied by scientists, chased by police, misunderstood by the people of the world. With the harsh media spotlight removed, will he be able to achieve normalcy at last?

Answer: Yes

At first, "Weekly World News" stories were factual -- in a sense. People who genuinely believed that aliens had landed, or that Elvis was alive, would call in, and their stories would be written up as straight news without further fact-checking. Reporter Sal Ivone told "The Washington Post," "If a guy calls and says Bigfoot ran away with his wife, we wrote it as straight as an AP story." Eventually, embellishments on these somewhat fact-based stories became more and more elaborate, until many stories were made up out of whole cloth by "Weekly World News" reporters and staffers. The tabloid retained its straight-news writing style, often quoting anonymous experts to provide a veneer of respectability. "A baffled scientist" was a favorite commentor.

"Weekly World News" editors were under no illusions about what they were purveying. Derek Clontz (brother of Eddie Clontz from Question 3, and an editor at the paper for fifteen years) bragged to "The Washington Post": "We were the Beatles of fake journalism."

Answer: Bat Boy Lives!

"Bat Boy Lives!" -- with everyone's favorite freak of nature gracing the cover -- was published in paperback by Sterling in 2005. The back of the book provides an excellent summary of the tabloid's appeal:

"Where else could you find the scoop on which senators are aliens, or Saddam and Osama's torrid love affair? Serious newshounds know the Weekly World News (which counts over a million beings as readers) broke the story that Elvis still lives, but it also has exclusives on what kind of pizza was served at Jesus' last supper, who's the father of the Loch Ness monster's baby, and (of course) the various escapades of Bat Boy ..."

"All the News That Seemed Unfit to Print" was the title of "The Washington Post"'s article in appreciation of "Weekly World News," written by Peter Carlson and published on August 7, 2007.

Answer: August 27, 2007

"Due to the challenges in the retail and wholesale magazine marketplace that have impacted the newsstand, American Media, Inc. today announced it will close the print version of the Weekly World News, effective with the August 27 issue. Weekly World News was AMI's smallest weekly publication," read the July 21 statement received by the Reuters wire service (as reported by Jane Sutton). Sales had fallen by 50% in two years, according to the company's reports to the government. Old hands complained that the paper had been run into the ground by new management, who had hired comedy writers instead of funny journalists and converted Bat Boy into a weekly comic strip.

The news of "Weekly World News"'s impending doom received a surprising amount of attention in more traditional media. Headline writers had an unusual amount of fun with this. "Weekly World News to close (aliens not blamed!)" read the Reuters story. "The New York Times" -- America's paper of record -- instantly disputed this claim: "Tabloid Eaten by Aliens! Fake Columnist Loses His Job!"

The last issue, released the week prior to the date printed on the cover, included several of "Weekly World News"'s most popular themes. "Super-Depression Will Trigger New Civil War!" yelled a typically apocalyptic headline, while "Puppies Found on Titanic!" combined disaster obsessions with cute critters. There isn't any other publication quite like "Weekly World News."