Badges? We Don't Need No Stinking Badges! Quiz

Answer: Treasure of the Sierra Madre

"Treasure of the Sierra Madre" is a tale of three men who find themselves in Mexico with little money. They decide to prospect for gold and actually do quite well. They battle banditos, led by a man known as Gold Hat. One of the men is adopted by an Indian tribe after curing a child. Bogart's character develops paranoia about his share of the gold.

The quote comes from a scene where Gold Hat and his men claim to be Federales (police) who ask for the prospectors' weapons. They are asked to show their badges if they really are Federales. The actual movie quote from Gold Hat is: "Badges? We ain't got no badges. We don't need no badges. I don't have to show you no stinking badges." Predictably, a gun battle ensues.

This may not be true, but I heard that a line that was cut from the movie had one character say to Bogart: "There's a lot of gold in those hills." To which Bogart may or may not have replied: "That's a load of bullion."

Answer: Take a look at them. All nice guys. They'll finish last.

This quote is from 1946 and Durocher was talking about the New York Giants. He was managing the Brooklyn Dodgers at the time. He was not saying that they would finish last because they were nice. He was saying that they would finish last because they were not very good, but they happened to be nice guys. The Giants did in fact come in last in the league with a 61-93 record. Little did Durocher know that he would join the Giants two years later as manager.

Durocher also said: "I never did say that you can't be a nice guy and win. I said that if I was playing third base and my mother rounded third with the winning run, I'd trip her up". Nice guy.

Answer: For the love of money is the root of all evil

The entire section of 1 Timothy 6:10, from the King James Version, reads "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."
Mammon appears in Luke 16:13 of the King James Version: "No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."

In many cases, Mammon was meant as the deity of wealth and greed. Another saying of note is that women like your time and your money. To put it mathematically: women=time x money. Since time is money, you could say: women=money x money. Money is the root of all evil so: money= square root of evil. Square both sides: money squared=evil. Going back 3 equations: women=money squared=evil. Ergo, you could say women are evil. (I'm not saying that, but you could say that).

Answer: Dragnet

"Just the facts, ma'am" was said in the 1987 "Dragnet" movie. But it was never said in either the TV series or the radio series that preceded it. Jack Webb played the wooden Sgt. Joe Friday on both radio and TV. There were 376 episodes of the first and second iterations of the TV show. There were a further 74 episodes combined of "The New Dragnet" which debuted in 1989 and "L.A. Dragnet" which debuted in 2003.

My favorite episode was the one where Friday and his partner Gannon arrested a judge who had dressed like a criminal for a Halloween costume party. They learned never to book a judge by his cover.

Answer: I am not a crook.

Right quote, wrong circumstance. Nixon did actually say "I am not a crook". He was not, however, talking about the Watergate break-in. This statement occurred in a press conference when he was asked a pointed question about whether he ever profited from public life. "I have earned every cent. And in all of my years of public life I have never obstructed justice. People have got to know whether or not their President is a crook. Well, I am not a crook. I've earned everything I've got".

Speaking of crooks, did you hear about the two criminals who bought a small hotel in the country? They were "innmates".

Answer: No

Twain did not even come up with the premise of the coldest winter being a summer somewhere. He once quoted a letter from someone else who said the coldest winter he'd ever seen was the previous summer. Twain read that and opined: "He must have spent it in Paris".

By the way, the "death" that was an exaggeration was that of his cousin, James Ross Clemens. Somehow the media got their story wrong when James Clemens was sick. The reporter who did that must have gotten his scoop at the ice cream parlor.

Answer: Col. William Prescott, Battle of Bunker Hill

This saying has popularly been attributed to Andrew Jackson during the War of 1812. Wrong guy, wrong war. Col. Prescott said it during the American Revolutionary War. The exact wording was: "Don't fire until you see the whites of their eyes. Then, fire low!"

Gen. McAuliffe has his own saying. When asked by the German Commander during the Battle of Bastogne if he wanted to surrender, McAuliffe sent back the one word reply: "Nuts!"

What Gen. Custer said at the Battle of the Little Big Horn wasn't recorded--mainly because his troops were too busy fighting (and losing) against insurmountable numbers to write down any pithy comments he may have had.

Answer: Those are his actual words

Berra was actually giving directions to his house in New Jersey. The road there had a fork in it. Either fork would lead to his house. His sayings have been collected in the books "The Yogi Book: I Really Didn't Say Everything I Said", "What Time Is It? You Mean Now? Advice for Life From the Zennest Master of All", and "When You Come to a Fork in the Road, Take It! Inspiration and Wisdom From One of Baseball's Greatest Heroes".

I like to give forks as birthday presents. I personally feel there is no tine like the present.

Answer: The rest is silence.

"The rest is silence" are Hamlet's final words. He is dying, his mother is dead, and Claudius is dead. Hamlet realizes that nothing more will be heard from him and or his bloodline.

Then again, Shakespeare could have been hinting at the next play he intended to write. It would have been a story about the potato famine. It was to be called "The Silence of the Yams."

Answer: No one ever said that

In the original series, no one ever said "Beam me up, Scotty". What they usually said was "Energize". Sometimes they might say "Beam me aboard" or "Two to beam up". But no one ever said "Beam me up, Scotty." Of course Scotty was the nickname of Chief Engineer Scott.

Any time Kirk wanted to beam a landing party down to the surface he had to really think things through. There was a lot of preparation to be done. You could say he had to really planet.