Absurd Italian 506 Trivia Quiz

Answer: Excuse me Madame, but there's a crocodile in your suitcase.

Cocodrillo is a crocodile, noce di cocco is coconut they are sometimes served in a little fountain arrangement at the seaside, a littly pyramid of coconut pieces! This is dedicated to my friend Rosedevents, a former librarian who once saw a gentleman patron photocopying a coconut and no one knew how to ask him why in any language!

Answer: At night, you'll see about a hundred bats in the sky from your window.

Un pipistrello is a bat. Un gufo is one word for an owl, there are several others. Hundred year olds are centenari. Il giardino is the garden (yard in US English). This is dedicated to a tourist book a few of us read out loud one evening in Sri Lanka concerning the singing fish in this lake, the Germans read the German version, and so on, it was the most hilarious passage I've ever heard!

Answer: The chimpanzee wanted to join the football team. (soccer US).

Sciampu is the way shampoo is occasionally written, though I've also seen the shampoo spelling. Many beauty words come from French. Conditioner is most often called 'balsamo'. And what makes you laugh about a chimp on a team? After all the Bonzo movies with Ronald Reagan?

Answer: Aunt Maria's poodle held a theater ticket in his mouth.

I just verified this last week in Italy, and sure enough the little barboncino at the pet shop licked my hand and melted my 'cuore'. Something about poodles makes me laugh, and yet they are so clever and dignified. I'd never laugh in their presence.

Answer: In the country of dreams, butterflies are kings.

Paese is used for country as well as village. Farfalle, in case you hadn't noticed they looked like butterflies in the pasta shape, are those charming insects. This saying is based on 'in the country of the blind, the near sighted are the kings'.

Answer: You've lost your pen again? Well, just write with your nose!

La tua biro is the name for the Bic style pen. This is also used in the UK. You may also hear 'una penna biro' but biro for short.

Answer: Please may I have a glass of water for my mosquito?

Le zanzare are prevalent in many regions in the summer. 'I zingari' are Tzigane or gypsies and they have camps all over Italy and Europe in general. I've heard of pet fleas and rocks, but not pet mosquitos!

Answer: Little Red Riding Hood was sad because she had lost the butter for her granny in the forest.

As in French and English, Little Red is known for her clothing and it is the masculine in both Italian and French. So you do get rather interesting linguistic problems referring to a female character by a masculine name. Not any worse than Mickey being a male and a mouse being female. Doesn't bother them much! Il burro is butter.

In many versions, it's bread and butter, or cake she brings. In modern Italy the fashion is to call anything 'della nonna' to indicate homemade or good flavor. Five flavors of ice cream are called 'della nonna'.

A true guarantee of quality as who would dare question your grandmother? Il bosco is the most common word for forest. 'Frutto del bosco' is strawberries, blueberries etc.

Answer: The queen asked for an onion to cry better.

Though the Italian Royal family is not allowed to reenter the country except for some very rare exceptions, the Italians still love stories of royalty and purchase magazines galore to read about them.

Answer: Monkeys must be kept on a leash!

Monkeys have recently been imported as exotic pets and believe it or not I found a passage describing them actually being walked on leashes. I have also seen a fully grown ferret on a leash as well (il furetto). Il guinzaglio is the word for leash (lead British usage).

The most common sign is 'Cani al guinzaglio' along the long pedestrian avenues. The Italians are much more conscientious of their dog's behavior than the French and the police give fines.