Robert Rankin Trivia

1. What is the name of the pub owned by O'Fagin?

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: The Middle Man

The tale of Jonny Hooker opens with his headless corpse in the ornamental pond of Gunnersbury Park. Unfortunately, there seems to be no way to avoid this tragic event. One week earlier, however, Jonny woke up one morning to discover a letter addressed to him inviting him to solve the Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code. He and his childhood imaginary friend (who seemed to want to hang around), Mr. Giggles, decided to crack the code and solve the mystery in order to bring action and possible wealth into their otherwise bleak lives. After helping his mother back onto the toilet, Jonny left for The Middle Man, owned by pubkeeper O'Fagin. Here, he learned that the code was somehow related to Robert Johnson, who played his mysterious (and thought-to-be-unplayed) thirtieth song at that very pub, the fact that many famous musicians died at the age of twenty-seven, and the idea of the Devil's laughter being played at the end of Johnson's track. After leaving the pub, Jonny walked through Gunnersbury Park contemplating the ideas he has just come across when all of a sudden, he noticed a small child drowning in the ornamental pond. Although he attempted to help the child, which no one else saw, he was dragged out and sectioned- doomed to be placed in an asylum. No one else believed there was a small child in the pond.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: In a diner

This story resumes from just after where "Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse" leaves off. After becoming mayor of Toy City, Eddie ended up making changes that the residents of the city disliked. Due to this, he was taken out of the city limits, tarred, and feathered, before he ran back to the Toymaker for help. The Toymaker reverted him back to normal, taking away his opposable thumbs and eerie button eyes. After going to Tinto's, Eddie realizes that he should get his gang back together to earn money and restabilize himself, so he heads out to find Jack, who had become a prince after the previous case. Eddie finds him working as a chef at a Nadine's Diner franchise having lost his castle (as monarchy was removed from the city due to Eddie's proposed Edict #4). Jack agrees to come along and they return to the late Bill Winkie's office...where they find a dead clockwork monkey on the floor.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: Anthrax

The story opens with Jack, who has left his small village and confining life of factory work for a life of fame, fortune, wealth, and consumer durables in the big city. However, his journey has been ended by a farmer who warns him not to travel ahead for it will bring him great misfortune. Jack goes anyways and falls into a pit of rather large spikes (managing to miss them all) and the farmer reveals that he has survived by eating the bodies of other travellers who have not heeded his words. Using his clockwork weapon, Jack is able to turn the tables and acquire the farmer's horse before galloping off to the city. When he arrives, he discovers a city comprised of houses made of faded alphabet blocks. He decides to stop at an eatery named Nadine's Diner where he finds a wooden server behind the counter who claims that he is out of stock because his delivery of small boys seeking fame in the city has been cut short and he is out of food. Jack settles for gruel but soon discovers that his horse has been taken. He leaves and gets ambushed by thugs. Eddie Bear wakes him up some time after, introduces himself and takes him to Tinto's Bar to recuperate.

From Quiz The Brightonomicon

Answer: Rizla

When Rizla was supposed to take his girlfriend, Enid Earles, to Brighton, he wound up being thrown from a pier into a lake. Hugo Rune found Rizla, who had lost all memory, renamed him, and offered him a deal he couldn't refuse. Rizla was assigned the task of being Hugo Rune's apprentice in order to solve twelve cases in the city of Brighton which are based on Rune's Brightonomicon; twelve zodiac signs found on a map of Brighton's streets. After signing a contract in blood, Rizla had no choice but to join in the adventure. This book takes place in the 1960s.

From Quiz Robert Rankin- Sex and Drugs and Sausage Rolls

Answer: The centre of the Earth

As he likes to explain, "I've been many years below". However, upon returning, it becomes evident that much about the world has changed and Soap has a great deal of trouble securing the fame and glory which his adventures surely merit. This would be due largely to the problem that no-one seems to believe him.

From Quiz Robert Rankin's 'Armageddon the musical!'

Answer: Phnaargos

Dabbling with our very existence to create a T.V. show known as 'Earthers', the people of Phnaargos are a race of people whose planet grows everything you need to produce t.v. shows.

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: A sweet nose

When Jonny woke up in an asylum room, he was greeted by the beautiful Nurse Hollywood with her distinguishing sweet nose. While she offered to get him a Full English breakfast, she forced him to take a questionnaire however, when a second, burlier nurse, Nurse Cecil, entered the room, he was shocked to find that none of the events may have been real. Before Nurse Cecil was able to inject Jonny with a seemingly-lethal hypodermic needle, Jonny was taken to the prestigious Dr. Archy, and he took the opportunity to leap through a window to escape. He immediately headed to Gunnersbury Park to find a safe haven, but instead he found Ranger Hawtrey and Ranger Connor. Rather than remain on the lam without a place to stay, Jonny stole a ranger outfit from their hut in the park and posed as Ranger David Chicoteen. Although Ranger Connor saw him on the TV a bit later, he thought nothing of the coincidence and strikingly similar appearances. Ranger Hawtrey decided to show 'Ranger Chicoteen' the ropes shortly after. During their walk, Hawtrey said that he also saw the dying boy in the lake and that he knew who Jonny really was. He also made note of the fact that his identical twin brother could hear odd noises that were believed to be from a mysterious air loom headed by the evil Count Otto Black (a reason why he always wore a layer of tin foil under his hat), but that was enough of the topic until later. Hawtrey also mentioned that he knew where the notes regarding the Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code contest were being created; the local museum on the park grounds. They decided to make a trip there.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: Dolly Dumpling

Jack and Eddie realize that the cymbal-playing monkey in their office has been turned into a dusty shell of what it once was, and that eleven other monkeys have suffered the same fate of Spontaneous Toy Combustion. They take their leads to a cigar store in Toy City where the owner tells the duo that it was only yesterday when he sold one hundred cigars to Eddie. Eddie, of course, denies this and claims that a twin of himself bought them. The cigar store owner also tells them to fear the chickens before revealing that he flicked on the silent alarm. The cops arrive and arrest the two, but Chief Inspector Wellington Bellis asks them to solve the case of the Spontaneous Toy Combustion, as they were responsible for saving the Preadolescent Poetic Personalities of "Hollow Chocolate Bunnies". Jack ends up taking his girlfriend, Amelie, to Old King Cole's jazz bar where they see Dolly Dumpling in concert. Unfortunately, while they're there, her band become a victim of the same fate as the monkeys, and Dolly Dumpling is helplessly murdered.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: In his swimming pool

Eddie describes the situation. He is the bear sidekick of Bill Winkie, who has mysteriously disappeared. He needs a new partner for a case he must solve, so he asks Jack to come along for the ride (to which Jack agrees). The first murder they investigate is that of the nursery rhyme character and Preadolescent Poetic Personality, Humpty Dumpty, who lives in a ritzy apartment in Toy City. The two detectives sneak in and find that the murder scene is Humpty's swimming pool located under a large stained glass sunflower skylight. Eddie notes that the water level has clearly lowered as there are markings around the pool, but the body has been dead for five days. When Eddie dives in to investigate, Jack realizes that the center of the large sunflower window is a convex lens. He pulls Eddie out just before the sun hits high noon and heats the pool to a ferocious boil. While the two dry off in Humpty's kitchen, Eddie discovers a hollow chocolate bunny in the fridge that seems to have been missed by the police.

From Quiz The Brightonomicon

Answer: The ocarina

Hugo Rune has been known to do many things, and he goes by many names like Perfect Master, Logos of the Aeon, and Hokus Bloke. Rune saved Rizla from drowning off the shores of Brighton and with Rizla's help, he solves twelve conundrums based upon his Brightonomicon in order to retrieve the Chronovision, a television created by a Benedictine monk which allows its viewers to view scenes from the past. There're a few things though. The Chronovision is stored somewhere in Brighton, and the people that placed it there are long dead. In addition to this, the evil Count Otto Black, Rune's arch-nemesis, is also searching for the Chronovision.

From Quiz Robert Rankin's 'Armageddon the musical!'

Answer: Dalai Lama

He is also the host of the game show 'Nemesis', watched exclusively on 'Buddhavision', and is definitely the anti-hero of the book.

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: Joan

When Jonny and Ranger Hawtrey arrived at the Gunnersbury Museum, they made their way through the secret passages within the walls to the basement where they found a stored printing press. This press was used to make the letters regarding the Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code sent to Jonny and others. The two headed to the reception desk and talked to Joan. She mentioned that James Crawford, who oversaw the activities of the museum, had been killed (by none other than Jonny Hooker). Later, when Jonny headed to The Middle Man to think this over, O'Fagin called the cops on him, and he was forced to flee. He decided to investigate James Crawford's house while wearing the ranger outfit to trick the cops into letting him in. Once inside, Jonny discovered that James Crawford had been brutally decapitated (his head had gone missing as well). With the help of his police officer friend (and bandmate), Paul, he was able to also search through Robert Johnson's records to find a secret, thirtieth recording known as "Apocalypse Blues". With this new clue, Jonny headed back to Gunnersbury Museum and discovered a diary left by James Crawford regarding the mysterious air loom. Shortly after reading a bit, someone came looking for the diary and Jonny was forced to hide. He went back to the hospital with Ranger Hawtrey for answers following this.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: A spaceman

While Jack is arrested once again (this time for quadruple murder of the band at Old King Cole's), Eddie is guided by Tinto to speak with a spaceman in the corner of the bar. The spaceman reveals himself to be a vanguard of an alien strikeforce. When Eddie is forced to save Jack at the police station, they return and Tinto asks him about the message that he just gave to them. Eddie realizes that he never received a message and Tinto clarifies that he just gave Eddie a message from the vanguard spaceman. The detectives realize that Tinto actually gave the letter to the Eddie clone, who bought the cigars earlier. They decide to follow their new lead to the old Toy Town remains, where many of the PPPs lived before the town expanded. When they arrive at Bill Winkie's house, they hide in the basement and discover that an Eddie clone (and a Jack clone) has made a base in the house. At that point, where they discover their doppelgangers, they are engulfed in a bright, white light. It isn't until they're driving back through Toy City that they realize that they were abducted by aliens.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: Little Boy Blue & Boy & Boy Blue

While the two are in Humpty's apartment, the police arrive as Chief Inspector Wellington Bellis feels that murderers always return to the scene of the crime. Eddie and Jack hide in the fridge and Jack eats the chocolate bunny (their only evidence) as a result. After this, they head to Little Boy Blue's gaudy mansion posing as famous, wealthy individuals (with outfits given to them by Eddie's pal, Wibbly). Jack is able to distract Officer Chortle while Eddie looks into the murder of the owner of 'Oh Boy!' fashion stores, Boy Blue. It turns out, Little Boy Blue was skewered by his own shepherd's crook. Eddie also finds an additional chocolate bunny on the scene, so they decide to head to the nearby chocolate factory for answers regarding this recurring evidence.

From Quiz The Brightonomicon

Answer: Mr. Orion

For their first mystery, Rizla and Rune went to Hangleton in order to search for Mr. Orion's (and his wife Aimee's) lost dog. Rizla felt that searching for a lost dog wasn't much of a case, but Rune assured him that it was necessary for their journey. When they arrive in Hangleton, they find their destination, Dogs 'R Us. You may say, 'Hey! There were no places called Something or Other 'R Us back in the sixties', but Rune's got that covered too. He mentions the Chevalier Effect. Basically, the Chevalier Effect occurs when facts brought up in the book are historically inaccurate, but appear later in life. For example, Rizla asks if the Chevalier Effect is like the Greenhouse Effect (which it definitely isn't), and although the Greenhouse Effect wasn't a term coined until later in the twentieth century, it was because of the Chevalier Effect (which was named after a Maurice Chevalier song in which two characters contradict everything the other says). Despite the things that seem like anachronisms, everything was certainly there at the time, I assure you. Anyway, after asking Mr. and Mrs. Orion about the dog, Rizla decided to leave Mr. Rune, and Rune said that Rizla would come back later in the day and the mystery would be solved. When Rizla goes to the local pub and speaks with his friend, Fangio (who appears throughout the novel in different places), a young boy walks into the pub and talks about the stolen Hangleton Hound. It turns out that Mr. Rune stole the dog in order to return it later, and Rizla returned to Rune's house, thus proving Mr. Rune to be right. Throughout the novel, people begin to discover that the prize-winning dog that was stolen not only grew to the size of a Shetland Pony, but it was also like a Russian Doll. Every once in a while, people would start finding increasingly smaller dogs within the Hangleton Hounds that were being produced, and the city would start to have a large population of these dogs.

From Quiz Robert Rankin's 'Armageddon the musical!'

Answer: The Devianti

A more vicious group you can't imagine. The leaders of this group are definitely two of my favourite characters in the book.

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: Hari

When Hawtrey and Jonny arrived at the cottage hospital, they ended up speaking to a lady in a straw hat outside and they managed to gain access to the hospital despite a large crowd of people and police blockades. Inside, they found Joan working the reception desk (she does it in her spare time). It is from her that they learn that Jonny Hooker had killed Doctor Archy, who Jonny actually did have the chance to meet during his stay in the asylum. When Jonny and Ranger Hawtrey reached the cell of Hari Hawtrey, they found him floating above the floor in a lotus position. Hari told Jonny the story of the Devil's Laughter, claiming that when one listens to select, digitally-enhanced versions of the song "Ombra Mai Fu" (sung by Alessandro Moreschi), one can hear angels singing the chorus. This will cause them to experience things as they never had before (this is one of the reasons why Hari can levitate). Jonny, Hari, and Ranger Hawtrey managed to break Hari out of the asylum with an old switcheroo trick and they reunited at The Middle Man. They told Jonny he would need to go it alone while they fled to lay low in Tierra Del Fuego. They gave him a compass which actually pointed in the wrong direction, and Hari warned Jonny to start wearing tin foil under his cap, to block the magnetic beams of the Air Loom.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: Their solemn vow to never return

After the abduction incident, Eddie decides that they need to find out what to do next, but in order to do that, they need to remember what happened. Count Otto Black immediately says he won't do it, as his intense hypnosis sessions usually corrupt the minds of those affected. It is only after Eddie and Count Otto work out a deal involving 50% of the earnings from their reward, a hat, a watch, a trenchcoat, and a car, that he ends up allowing the procedure to be done. After such an utterly terrifying hypnosis session, Jack is absolutely fine, but the famous Count Otto Black has succumbed to his own methods and become a vegetable. All they know is that the ordeal involves some odd chicken/spacemen creatures. After this, they head to Tinto's Bar and they are introduced to Wallah the Pocket Calculator, which Jack promptly steals, as it may be an asset in their case.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: Jill

They learn from the doorman at the chocolate factory (who won't let them in) that a woman in an obscure feathered bonnet snuck over the fence, then returned with a sack full of chocolate the other week. Since they aren't allowed in, they decide to go to a bawdy house, where women wear feathered bonnets on many occasions. Here, Eddie introduces Jack to Madame Goose, who also introduces Jack to Jill, another human. After the two spend an evening together, Jack checks in the kitchen for Eddie only to discover that Madame Goose has been murdered and plucked and that Eddie is missing. Jill deduces numerous facts about the murderer (who hid in the closet, killed Madame Goose and slit Eddie's throat causing him to lose lots of sawdust filling) and they head off on a lead to 'Oh Boy!' where Officer Chortle manages to arrest Jack and throw him into the back of a cop car. However, it's run off the road by the lady in the feathered bonnet. The whereabouts of Jill are unknown.

From Quiz The Brightonomicon

Answer: Nurse Hearse

In the beginning of this case, Rizla and Rune decided to go to a lecture by the popular paranormal investigator and psychic youth, Danbury Collins. Although Rizla thought that Mr. Collins just spouted a bunch of new age mumbo-jumbo, Rune had full confidence in Danbury, so they went to The Rampant Squire. When they arrived, they talked to Fangio at the bar (he works there too because after all, everyone needs a hobby), and during the lecture, Rizla was knocked unconscious. At the hospital, the odd Doctor Proctor and Nurse Hearse planned to take Rizla into their ambulance, remove his organs and extremities (while he was still alive), stuff them into wrapped boxes, and sell them to organ donor clinics. Luckily, Rizla woke up in the ambulance and with the help of Hugo Rune (and a mysterious centaur), he was able to prevent himself from becoming an involuntary organ donor.

From Quiz Robert Rankin's 'Armageddon the musical!'

Answer: 1958

This was the year in which Elvis was due to enlist.

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: Nurse Hollywood

Now on his own, Jonny was told by Mr. Giggles that he must not continue with his task. Giggles told Jonny this wholeheartedly because if Jonny died, then Mr. Giggles would die too. Regardless, Jonny vowed to crack the code. He decided to go see Paul, who simply reminded him that they had a performance with their band at The Middle Man that week. Meanwhile, Inspector Westlake headed a team of police units who were asked to guard a certain party that was to take place at Gunnersbury Park. He and a certain Constable Justice ware told to speak to Joan about a conversation they needed to have with the manager of 'The Big House' (the museum) of the park, Countess Vanda. Jonny, however, took a trip back through the walls of the museum and ended up finding two small holes (actually in the eyes of a portrait in the museum) to spy through and he discovered that the important Countess Vanda was actually Nurse Hollywood, who he assumed wasn't real after his encounter with her. He made his way to the basement and found a laptop owned by the late James Crawford. Cracking the password, he discovered info about the Devil's interval, and placed the computer in the poacher's pocket of his ranger uniform.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: Hollywood

With help from Wallah, the duo makes their way to the Toy City Opera House where they discover that their doppelgangers have arrived before they have. They decide to make their way through a conveniently-placed sewer pipeline to meet the phantom of the opera house. He directs them to the royal box overlooking the theatre. Luckily, it is empty due to Eddie's edict #5, which rids Toy City of any and all royalty. Soon, they realize that the clockwork orchestra is to be attacked next and they head to the catwalk to save them. Luckily, with the help of the phantom of the opera, they ruin the chandelier overtop the stage and stop the fake Eddie and Jack. Unfortunately, it's too late, and the clockwork orchestra is destroyed. They quickly rush off in pursuit of the two evildoers but they realize they are also being pursued by the UFO that abducted them earlier. They make their way to the large TOY TOWN sign in old Toy Town and destroy the object before crossing the planes and falling through the 'Second Big O'. It is then that they realize they're in Hollywood.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: Knob Hill

Jack wakes up in a cell with Eddie who has lost lots of his stuffing. Using Eddie's growler, he is able to unlock the cell that they are kept in and escape to an alley where they find the car driven by the lady in the feathered bonnet. Jack rushes to Mr. Anders' house where he is able to ask the fascinating toymaker to fix Eddie. The next morning, the two of them head to Wibbly's where Eddie discovers that he too has been murdered. They then go to the clockwork car factory and showcase only to find that it has been set on fire. Fearing that the lady in the feathered bonnet is always one step ahead of them, they head into the crowd (where Jack has to crawl since all of the spectators are toys) and they find that the lady in the feathered bonnet is literally right behind them. They hide in a cop car and call on the radio for help, but the lady manages to stop the car from driving with enormous strength, despite Jack's attempts at running her over. They finally manage to get away, but they find themselves once again in the hands of the police.

From Quiz The Brightonomicon

Answer: The Mound and Merkin

In their third mystery, Rizla and Rune went to The Mound and Merkin where they met Bartholomew Moulsecoomb, a descendant of Black Jack Moulsecoomb who had lost his brother. Rizla and Rune discover something odd at the Moulsecoomb household and manage to take a gun and encounter a UFO. Rizla then saw Doctor Proctor and Nurse Hearse taking Bartholomew's brother (which is actually his brother's clone) towards a space crab (named Ahab), and they were knocked unconscious. When they came to, they were forced to fight everyone alongside the Moulsecoomb Militia, who Rizla and Rune found out about at the house, and Rizla save Rune's life (as Rune predicted). Things got pretty chaotic and Rizla was knocked out again. In the end, pretty much all that was good was saved, Doctor Proctor had died (which I guess is a good thing), and the Space Crab had left the planet.

From Quiz Robert Rankin- Sex and Drugs and Sausage Rolls

Answer: A horse

He gathers together a wealth of DNA from the manure of several good looking horses and proceeds to produce a clone. Since, half-way through the process, he is arrested and imprisoned for the sale of illegal videos of secretly filmed Chilean Police interrogations, the experiment, left to its own devices, actually produces dozens of tiny horses no bigger than mice which have all disappeared by the time Norman manages to get back to his kitchen.

From Quiz Robert Rankin's 'Armageddon the musical!'

Answer: Rambo Bloodaxe

He and his sidekick survive the entire book and manage a hearty meal in the final chapters!

From Quiz The Da-Da-De-Da-Da Code

Answer: Dry Rot

When Jonny left the Gunnersbury Big House, he headed back to the Middle Man. During this time, however, a great black being managed to steal a paddy wagon from the park and drive it across town. Although Inspector Westlake, Constable Justice, and numerous constables tried to stop it, it crashed straight through The Middle Man (while Jonny and O'Fagin were in the back, luckily). O'Fagin was devastated by the occurrence and decided to have a concert for famous rock musicians to earn his money back. Jonny's band was included. The ranger's hut was also destroyed in Gunnersbury Park and Ranger Conner was shocked. Jonny happened to find a key for the air loom on the stretcher of the creature pulled out of the car, but the creature itself mysteriously transformed into a mummy (from hundreds of years ago) before destroying its dusty self. It was determined that the Secret Order of the Golden Sprout may be somewhat responsible.

From Quiz The Toyminator

Answer: Dimac

When they realize they re no longer in Toy Town, Eddie and Jack find a place to stay for the night and head out to finish their mystery. Along the way they're ambushed by a homeless man who wants to take Eddie (since he's a real talking bear). Jack takes out his clockwork gun, but it's unable to fire since it's a simple mechanism from another world and will not work in others. They are able to knock him out and continue to Mann's Chinese Theater where they meet Dorothy, a girl from Kansas trying to make it big in the film industry. They go to coffee at the Golden Chicken Diner where Jack tells her the whole situation about Eddie and himself being from a city of toys. Jack thinks she'd be a great asset to the team (what with the fact that legally, her hands are considered lethal weapons since she knows the ancient martial art of Dimac), but Eddie won't have it, saying she'd be a nuisance, distraction, and a hassle. Jack decides to go to the bathroom for a moment and he realizes that Wallah is still operating. Wallah says that in the long run, Dorothy will be more trouble, but in the short run, she'll be helpful. Wallah also says that it doesn't have much longer to live, and neither does Eddie since the magic of Toy City can't cross the inter-planetary planes. Wallah says it has one day left to live while Eddie may have three or so. When Jack returns to the table, Eddie is gone. Dorothy explains that he just took Eddie out of the restaurant with him, and Jack discovers that the doppelgangers are still on their trails. With Eddie kidnapped, he must solve the case alone and save his bestest friend.

From Quiz The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Answer: Jack Spratt

The duo is held in the police station until Chief Inspector Bellis tells them the killer has struck once again and they are free to leave. They also learn that the lady in the feathered bonnet was not actually a lady. The Preadolescent Poetic Personality who bit the dust this time was none other than Jack Spratt, who hit it big creating a line of lean cuisine restaurants while his divorced wife, Nadine, opened a chain of low quality burger diners. Jack and Eddie head out but the two soon realize that both Bill Winkie's car and the car of the lady in the feathered bonnet are unusable, so they eat at Nadine's Diner. It isn't until they leave and talk to Tinto that they realize that Jack Spratt was coated in butter and deep-fried in the very restaurant where they had just ate. Tinto also gives the two the 'Maguffin'; an object with no discernible meaning, except for when the time comes to use it. It's after this that Eddie receives tickets from Wibbly for seats to watch 'Tuff It on the Tuffet'- Little Miss Muffet's TV show.

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