Apun My Soul! Trivia Quiz

Answer: What impressive flying buttocks

In simple terms, flying buttresses (the pun is in "buttocks") are strong curved arches, usually made of stone, jutting out from the external walls of massive cathedrals. They look a little like arms in a way and their purpose is stop the walls of the main part of the building collapsing outward from the weight of all the material added on top. They direct the pressure from these walls down into the ground instead. Though associated mainly with Gothic architecture, these amazing innovations are actually first described as far back as the Bible, in Ezekiel 41:6-7. I was astonished to learn that. Describing the building of a temple, these verses state:

"And the side chambers were three, one over another, and thirty in order; and they entered into the wall which was of the house for the side chambers round about, that they might have hold, but they had not hold in the wall of the house.

And there was an enlarging, and a winding about still upward to the side chambers: for the winding about of the house went still upward round about the house: therefore the breadth of the house was still upward, and so increased from the lowest chamber to the highest by the midst." (King James version)

Answer: Lemonade

Lemonade (the pun would be "lemon aid") has been around in various forms for a very long time. This refreshing fluid is ideal for consumption in the long, hot summer months. Its basic ingredients are simply the juice of squeezed lemons, water and sugar. Mixed and chilled, it is a truly delicious and cooling drink. Middle Eastern countries use the addition of either limes, strawberries, or oranges as well and flavour their drinks with ginger, or, astonishingly, salt, saffron or garlic. Garlic flavoured lemonade. That's a new one. Perhaps Australia will introduce a Vegemite flavoured lemonade, now that the flood gates have been opened.

Commercial carbonated lemonade of course is also sold, and, apart from being tasty, is also excellent to help one burp, or to allow go flat and sip when feeling ill. Astonishingly, lemonade has other health benefits as well, for it's been found that one glass of home made lemonade a day can help stop the formation of kidney stones. Now if that doesn't justify rushing out to purchase a few bottles of the drink, then goodness knows what will. Hang the waistline.

Answer: You are lion

A lion (the pun is in "lying") is one of the four big cats that were once found in large quantities primarily in Africa and Asia, but sadly, which have disappeared from almost all but African countries now. Oh, sweet mankind, when will you ever learn to stop breaking the heart of Mother Nature?

The second largest of the big cats, the male lion is noted for the very impressive mane of hair it sprouts around its magnificent face. This mane acts to make the lion appear larger, to intimidate enemies; it indicates the health and fighting qualities of the male, and depending on the length and colour, is said to more than attract the female lionesses as well. What more could you ask for, boys? The Beatles had it right, after all.

Answer: I wish to bison

Of the six species of bison (the pun is "buy, son") that once roamed extensively through North America, western Europe and central Asia, only two remain. These are the commonly recognised American bison and its relative, the European wisent. These two creatures were almost hunted to extinction during the 19th century, but are now gradually repopulating thanks to the efforts of conservationists.

In Canada, however, this gracious old beast is still endangered. Of the two main surviving species, the American bison has shorter legs and a hairier body then its European counterpart, but the European has the longer legs and a hairier tail. I can't think why I think that's comical, but sadly, I do.

The shape of the horn is different as well. The European's horns are more ideal for fighting while the American prefers to butt. Obviously this is overcompensation for its tail.

Answer: This is a rectangle

A rectangle (the pun is "wrecked tangle") is a quadrilateral with four right angles (equiangular quadrilateral). A square is a rectangle with four sides of equal length. In other words, a rectangle looks like a square that has been sat upon. And there isn't much more to be said on this rather dull subject, unless of course you're a mathematician, in which case, you could sound off enraptured for half an hour or longer about it.

Answer: This is a nice flower

A swiftly flowing (the pun is the noun relating to same, as well as in the plant specimen) river is a river whose water volume is so dense and its bed at such a gradient, that the water moves along that bed at a rapid pace. Rivers flow downwards to either the sea, a lake, or join another river as its tributary.

In drier countries, such as Australia, many of our rivers flow inland and simply dry up until the next big rains. Then the centre of the country turns into a gigantic lake once more. This led to the widely held belief at one time in the early days of European exploration of this country, that Australia held a giant inland sea.

Indeed, many millennia ago, it once did, but sadly no longer. For most of the time, it's now just a giant salt pan.

Answer: Butter

Butter (the pun is "butt her") is a solidified dairy product made from milk. It is created by rapidly churning the richest part of that milk until a solid lump is formed, after which salt is usually added for flavour, and the end result packed into moulds until fully set. Quite delicious, sadly so for those of us with a tubbier form, butter is lovely on hot toast, hot scones, fresh bread, to add flavour to mashed potatoes or other vegetables, and added to other products to make lovely, longed for, delicious, mouth-watering cakes and puddings. Oh, stop, stop! Hot scones, be mine!

Answer: Let us go canoodling

Canoodling (the pun is in "noodle or noodles") is a physiological process many courting couples pass through where they simply cannot get enough of each other during the first stages of a new romance. It is simply various interpretations of amorous kissing, or hugging, or caressing and being in each other's arms as much as possible, that kind thing. Don't worry.

It doesn't last. Sadly. Sniff. After a few years of marriage, canoodling turns into "What's for dinner, darl? I'll just nick down to the pub until it's ready".

Answer: It became extinct

If a creature has become extinct (the pun is in "stink") it, sorrowfully so, has been hunted to extinction by man, or all its habitat has been destroyed so that it simply dies out. This is an incredibly sad process, though in some cases natural and not caused by man at all. After all, would you really want a dinosaur trampling on your petunias?

Skunks are moderately sized animals with short powerful legs and claws to enable them to expertly dig, or if they have to, defend themselves. Skunks however have a far more powerful method of defence than their claws. Located on either side of their rear end, these rather pretty looking creatures have two glands, which, when their owner feels threatened, can emit a powerful spray of foul smelling chemicals with deadly accuracy. Such is the power of that long lasting smell, the little skunk can even ward off far larger predators, such as bears. The smell of a skunk attack can be detected more than a mile away. How amazing is that? Because of this, the skunk has few natural enemies. No wonder!

Answer: Kookaburra

The pun here is in "cook a burra". A burra (or burro) is an everyday word used for the adorable little donkey. Kookaburras are beautiful Australian birds known for their swiftness of flight, their deadly accuracy, their razor sharp beaks, but more than anything else, for their strange unearthly call.

This sound is like high-pitched, intensely maniacal laughter, and it can last for several minutes at a times. It is heard most often early in the dimly lit mornings, or after the bird has caught, and consumed, a large snake. For that skill alone, we love them here.

However the bird's insane laughter, when first heard by early European settlers in this country, actually terrified them out of their wits. A strange brooding land, silent, still, deadly and unknown in all directions, with dark mountains and tall trees looming menacingly over them at every step - and then - suddenly - wild insane laughter ringing out from somewhere in that forbidding bush. I would have caught the first boat back home again.