Hello, My Name is Oscar Trivia Quiz

Answer: The Wall Street crash

Oscar's diary continued: "That annoying Great Depression began in the year of my birth in the United States with the crash of the stock market there on October 29, 1929. I was almost five months old at the time and deeply resented the fact that everyone's attention was drawn away from me. My official baptism had taken place earlier, on May 16th in that year, at the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood, at an exclusive dinner party there.

The 270 people who attended certainly appreciated my entrance into the world that night I'm happy to say, and, ignoring the worried financial whispers going on behind the scenes, thoroughly wet my head with more than a few drinks on that most notable occasion".

Answer: Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences

Oscar's diary continued: "I was, as you'd appreciate, only very young at the time, and hadn't quite developed the skills to do all that planning myself, so the Academy stepped in instead. They've been handling it ever since. Once I recovered from my initial annoyance at a particular part of the evening, I granted them my gracious permission to do so. I wasn't terribly pleased at the overall process that first night you see, and made sure they put all the necessary adjustments in place for future events. The 270 cheapskates who attended only paid $5 each for the meal they wolfed down that evening - and it took ages before they were all finished.

The party after the ceremony took even longer than the dinner, but my actual part in the proceedings, to my great indignation, only took fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes! I ask you. They whisked through my presentation at the rate of knots, because everyone already knew to whom I was going to given. The media had been informed three months prior to the event. That form of premature disclosure would soon change though, and I would begin to receive the full ceremonial honours to which I was entitled".

Answer: Pluto

Oscar's diary continued: "My second birthday celebrations were held that year. I was cutting teeth, and, from my perspective, the evening was a howler. The winners that evening weren't given to the media until 11 pm, and didn't they resent it. They were like baying hounds deprived of a fox. For several more years, that process continued to be the same - only giving the names of the winners to the media late on the night of my annual celebrations.

It was all very secretive. That method didn't work very well either though, because the Los Angeles Times managed to obtain the list of winners one year, and revealed them all beforehand. Consequently, from 1941 onwards, sealed envelopes were used.

It was all very cloak and dagger and the envelopes were kept under lock and key till the ceremony began. I of course kept myself unsullied and pure above all those lower level goings on, and merely continued practising my speeches for the evening instead".

Answer: It was given early because he had to fly back to Europe.

Oscar's diary continued: "I still resent that Emil Jannings chap. He wasn't even present at the ceremony. Oh no, not him. Instead he stuffed me into his suitcase and I was dragged half way across the world because he hadn't planned his schedule properly and had to fly back to Switzerland. Stuffed me into a suitcase, mind you. Wrapped up in his underpants. I was so insulted. Nor do I approve of the films he won me for. One was called "The Last Command". That was about the communists (and me a Republican!) - and the other was "The Way of All Flesh". Need I say more?".

Answer: Academy Award of Merit

Oscar's diary continued: "My friends call me Oscar though, or Oz if they're intoxicated. A lot of that happens in Hollywood. I'm the oldest of the entertainment award family of course. The others all respect me. My half-sister Emmy is one. She was born in 1949 and always dresses up for any television show. Also, my dear old grandmother, Grammy, started showing up at music ceremonies in 1959 - she tickles the ivories brilliantly when she has a few under her tail. And of course there's my younger brother Tony who was born in 1947.

He "plays" (oh I do love a pun) up a little when we take him to the theatre, but he's just a kid, so we usually look the other way on those occasions. As the most experienced member of the family though, they all look up to me.

They even talk in awe about the days before I learned to talk. I wish they wouldn't mention that however. It involved many visits to a speech therapist until I learned to speak correctly in front of the cameras".

Answer: Bette Davis

Oscar's diary continued: "Ms Davis states with all the authority of a Sherman tank that she named me after her first husband. He was a band leader of the time, but I've never heard of him. His name was Harmon Oscar Nelson. Thank goodness she didn't call me Harmon if she's to be believed. That grand old animator Walt - we were good friends by then - also claims he named me. I'm inclined to think though that if he had, I'd be called Mickey or Mortimer.

The third claimant was Margaret Herrick who states she named me after her Uncle Oscar because I looked like him.

The very idea! I'm quite convinced he wore a wig. Whomever it was, and just between you and me, I don't care for the nickname at all. Adonis would have been far more suitable. However, and to my chagrin, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences liked the name so much that they officially adopted it in 1939".

Answer: It required him to pose in the nude.

Oscar's diary continued: "What a prude. I've been swanning around completely naked ever since I was born and I don't complain. They could at least have given me better endowments in some areas though. Recently I looked up a photograph of this fellow who was used as my original model, expecting to see a Mr World at the very least. And let me tell you right now, I've never been so affronted in my life! The man normally wore a whopping big sombrero and a huge drooping moustache.

They chose him - him - to be my template.

He looked like a Mexican serial killer".

Answer: The Second World War

Oscar's diary continued: "When I was born, my genetic structure was 92.5% tin and 7.5% copper. I was then gold-plated with britannium (a type of pewter) and set on a black metal base. Simply stunning, my dears. Measuring 13.5 inches tall and weighing in at 8.5 lbs at birth, a bonnier looking baby has never been seen in Hollywood since, I promise you.

The only alterations since that early time was that, as I grew older, I needed a little streamlining carried out on my feet. Surgical intervention was called for as my ankles were beginning to look like I had dropsy. During the Second World War, when metal was in such high demand, they used plaster for my body and wood for my base, but that was only temporary. We all had to do our bit back then, but on the completion of the war, when I received my medals for outstanding bravery, I was replaced in all my glory and re-presented to the original winners".

Answer: Offering it to the Academy first

Oscar's diary continued: "I should jolly well think so! The nerve of them wanting to take me to a pawn-brokers. Me! Gold-plated britannium and all. This legal necessity has been contested several times by the descendants of my winners. How could they not appreciate my worth? But no, dangle a carrot made out of big dollars in front of their noses and off they go galloping after it.

In my more noble moments though, I'm somewhat sympathetic. The legal ruling states that if a winner refuses to give the Academy the first right to buy me back, then they will not be presented with same.

However, the prize the Academy will pay is only one dollar. One dollar. One dollar! When I have been sold online for over $860,000. They have got to be kidding. So I tend to turn a blind eye under these circumstances".

Answer: President Ronald Reagan

Oscar's diary continued: "I loved Ronny. He had such twinkly eyes. Just between you, me and the ballot box, I think he made a jolly good President of the US from 1981 until 1989. I often think of course, in my more modest moments, that I would have also made an excellent President of this fine country as well, but all in all was satisfied with the job Ronny had done. His acting skills, however - well let's not talk about them. Suffice it to say he never got to take me home on any of my big nights.

Fifty of my clones are made every year in time for this great event, did you know that? They take approximately three weeks to manufacture to make sure they're all up to my exacting standards. 6,000 members of The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences vote on the ultimate winners. The names of these members are usually withheld from the public, although on occasion they continue to be "accidentally" released. Fourteen per cent of the membership are former nominees of the award themselves, while nineteen per cent comprises actual winners. Other membership - oh bother this, it's too boring reciting these dull facts and figures. Let's talk about ME instead. Lights, camera, action!".