Anatomy of a Song: "Werewolves of London" Quiz

Answer: A Chinese menu

"I saw a Werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand"

This has to be one of the most interesting opening lines to a song that I can think of. It definitely comes under the heading of "Now, there's something you don't see every day"!

The "It's not a purse, it's European" reference is taken from the Seinfeld episode "The Reverse Peephole", where Jerry is accused of being effeminate because of his use of a "small men's carryall".

Answer: Soho

"Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain"

Soho is synonymous with London's sex industry, but there is a lot more to it. As well as being a multi-cultural residential area for both upper and lower class, it boasts many entertainment venues and eating establishments.

Answer: Lee Ho Fook

"He was looking for the place called Lee Ho Fook's". Interestingly, you never find out in the song whether he found the place or not.

"Lee Ho Fook's" is an actual restaurant located London's Chinatown district. Ho Chi Minh probably never owned a food shop, he was far too busy being Prime Minister and then later, President, of Vietnam. "Loon Fung's" was the name of an Asian takeaway shop that opened in the street where I lived in the 70's. It was a butcher's shop before that, operated by a family with the surname of Penhaligan. Who said this wasn't a trivia site?

Answer: Beef Chow Mein

"Going to get a big dish of beef chow mein"

Funny, I had always understood that werewolves preferred human flesh. I suppose the word was out in the Werewolf community in terms of restaurants that may have meals 'under the counter'...if you knew how to ask!

"Four fried chickens, and a Coke" is a quote that will be familiar to devotees of "The Blues Brothers". Jake Blues orders this meal at the Soul Food Diner. Elwood asks for dry white toast.

Answer: It was raining

"Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain"

It may have been sunny. It might have been windy! We do know it was raining, however. At no time did Zevon say it was snowing. One thing is for sure, Zevon says "rain".

Answer: Howling

"You hear him howling around your kitchen door,
You better not let him in"

That's good advice. Keep that catflap shut as well. "Werewolves of London" featured on the soundtrack of the 1986 Tom Cruise and Paul Newman movie, "The Color Of Money".

Answer: She got mutilated

"Little old lady got mutilated late last night,
Werewolves of London again"

Despite what would seem to be an appropriate choice, "Werewolves of London" was not one of the songs featured in the unrelated 1981 film "An American Werewolf in London". All of the well known songs featured on the soundtrack contained the word "Moon". Affected men turn into Werewolves when a full moon occurs - so it is said.

Answer: Kent

"He's the hairy handed gent who ran amok in Kent"

Linda Ronstadt is known for singing (amongst other songs) "Poor Poor Pitiful Me". Did you know that Warren Zevon wrote the song?

Answer: Mayfair

"Lately he's been overheard in Mayfair"

Mayfair is the most expensive property on the British Monopoly board, paired with Park Lane. Piccadilly is one of the yellow properties, and The Strand is one of the red properties. Werewolf only eats at the best locations!

Answer: Lungs

"You better stay away from him,
He'll rip your lungs out, Jim"

Jim has been warned. "Werewolves of London" was the only song by Warren Zevon that made it to the U.S. top forty.

Answer: Both Lon Chaney and Lon Chaney Jr.

"Well, I saw Lon Chaney walking with the Queen,
Doing the Werewolves of London
I saw Lon Chaney, Jr. walking with the Queen,
Doing the Werewolves of London"

I never knew if Zevon meant Lon Chaney Sr. when he originally says Lon Chaney, or he was simply being more specific with the same Lon Chaney when he said it the second time! When I researched this for the quiz, it seems the answer is thus:

Lon Chaney Jr. played the werewolf in the 1940's movie "Wolfman", however, he was billed simply as Lon Chaney. I don't know if that's what Zevon was getting at, but that's as good an explanation as I was able to find.

Answer: Pina Colada

"I saw a werewolf drinking a Pina Colada"

This always made me laugh, given that I liked this song and detested "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" by Rupert Holmes. I always wanted there to be a way of mixing the two songs together, so that the Werewolf could eat poor old Rupert, and as fitting irony, consume his Pina Colada as a chaser.

Answer: Trader Vic's

"I saw a werewolf drinking a Pina Colada at Trader Vic's"

Armed with this information, we can do a little detective work. Our Werewolf stayed at the finest locations, it would seem. Their is only one Trader Vic's in all of the United Kingdom, and it is situated within the London Hilton, no less!

The reference to "The Dewdrop Inn" may be recognised by anyone who is familiar with the song "Uneasy Rider" by The Charlie Daniels Band. It is a song about a man whose car breaks down at a redneck bar in Mississippi, and his troubles are only just beginning! If you are unfamiliar with the song, I recommend you find it for a listen.

Answer: Perfect

"His hair was perfect"

But of course. Any self-respecting Werewolf would not be caught dead walking through London looking like a shag on a rock. Werewolves have standards too, you know!

Answer: Italy - "Home Llop"

A "Home Llop" is, of course, the Andorran description of a werewolf. Yes, I was saying "of course" tongue in cheek!

The correct Italian description for a werewolf is "Lupo Mannaro".

Sadly, Warren Zevon died on 7 September 2003, aged 56, of mesothelioma, a form of asbestos-related cancer. Whilst "Werewolves of London" may rank as his best-known work, it certainly wasn't his only contribution. Check out his many other works, if you had previously been deluded into thinking he was a one-hit wonder!