"Farscape," "John Quixote" Trivia Quiz

Answer: Gammak base

Chiana and John are on the transport pod, and Chiana brings John into a "reality" game just as D'Argo comms that there is trouble with Scorpius. John finds himself on Scorpius' gammak base, with his old love Gilina there, and Scorpius, and a heroic Stark who steps in to save them.

Answer: His mask is on a different side of his face

Stark has hair, but it isn't blond. He does, however, wear his mask on the left side in the game, not the right as usual. He is the Avatar of the game, as he designed it, incorporating the old John Crichton's memories into it, but somehow this John has become stuck inside it, unable to get out.

Answer: A TV

John and Chiana find themselves dressed up like a silly knight and squire respectively, standing outside a castle in a bizarre landscape. Suddenly John hears cries of help above from Aeryn in a blonde wig with a southern accent and a lisp. The next thing he knows a TV falls from the sky and lands on him, leaving a piece of shrapnel in his helmet. Meanwhile, in reality, John and Chiana are flying around their transport pod with no one steering.

Answer: Max Headroom

Stark takes John and Chiana in to find a way for him to get out. On a TV, John is dressed up and talks like Max Headroom, from the TV show of the same name that aired in the 80's. The other three are all references to shows or films that deal with someone being trapped in a game or hologram, etc., most notably in "Nightmares," which featured Emilo Estevez in a segment titled "The Bishop of Battle" where he gets stuck in a video game.

Answer: Kiss the Princess

Stark reads from the manual, "Your quest is for the Princess Fair to seek. The one a human's fleeting love did rend. Bring forth the sword and through the darkness peek. One loving kiss amends, and there's an end. And if we shades with taste do not agree, a door of green shall set your senses free." Basically, John has to kiss the princess, or find a green door.

Answer: Chocolate coins

Chocolate coins lead John and Chiana to a tiny door on the wall. When they touch it they find themselves on another level.

Answer: She's a fat, bald man

A fat, shirtless bald guy gets out of a rocking van with peace symbols from the sixties (the Mystery Van from "Scooby-Doo anyone?). He introduces himself, saying, "Hey, man. Relax, tagama. I am Pa'u Zotoh Zhaan. Tenth level Delvian priest." He warns them the ogre will get them if he tries to kiss the princess.

Answer: Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Rygel appears blocking the way, dressed as the Black Knight from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." He tells them, "None shall pass." John replies, going along with the movie, "Brave Sir Knight, I am King Arthur of Camelot. This is my loyal vassal, Patsy." John and Chiana try to walk around him, but he farts fire to block them. Chiana runs up and stabs him with her sword and he blows up, revealing a door under him.

Answer: Hansel and Gretel

D'Argo seems to be Hansel or the Witch, and Jool and Chiana are in a cage begging to be eaten. When John and Chiana appear, the Chiana in the cage says, "Hey Gretel, do you think they're here to be eaten?" John goes through the green door, but Chiana is tongued by D'Argo and she doesn't make it out. On the transport pod, John learns Scorpius has escaped but then has to go back into the game and look for Chiana.

Answer: Three Billy Goats Gruff

On John's first stop, he sees a Scarran wearing a red riding hood and kills it with his sword. The next stop is a Sheyang, and the John Headroom that runs the elevator yells, "Frog Princes!" And at the penthouse, he finds Aeryn, and Scorpius with a long nose, much like Pinocchio. John finds Chiana and they run through the green door rather than face the ogre... played by Crais, of course.

Answer: Aeryn makes a reference to something in the game she shouldn't know about

Scorpius takes over Moya with a neural harness and Aeryn knocks John out. Imprisoned, he and Chiana come up with an idea to trap Scorpius in the game, and when that works, Aeryn says they should leave the others and just leave, which is John's first clue. Then he finds one of Stark's vouchers in his pocket, a tiny white ball. He finds Chiana and tells her they are still in the game, and then it hits him he hasn't seen Sikozu or Noranti, who wouldn't have been in the game as the old John Crichton had never met them.

Answer: He knocks out Zhaan, runs over Rygel, and saves the real Chiana

Stark appears on the virtual Moya with a green door, or really a yellow one that has been painted green. Stark tells him, "This is all about you, John Crichton. You're far too sick to be allowed to run free in the universe. When you die on the outside, your mind will live on here with us. Welcome home, John." John goes through the game again, turning the lights on the van to shine on Zhaan and then John knocks him out. Next he runs Rygel over with the van and then ends up back with D'Argo eating Jool as a main course for dinner (who seems to be quite happy with it). Chiana is tied and gagged and John feels something isn't right, considering D'Argo implied he had eaten the game Chiana earlier. That's when it hits him that the real Chiana has been tied up the whole time. John frees her and the two go up the elevator to kiss the princess and end the game.

Answer: 'Ah do declare.

John enters to fight with the Ogre and Harvey and even Stark. Aeryn sees him and says, "You really are John Crichton. Can I get an autograph?" When a candle is cut in half she yells "I'm not going to clean up" and to Chiana she yells "Oh, girl, I can see who wears the pants in your family." When Harvey is cut down, she says, "redecoratin', blood everywhere..." and "Honey, the butler's dead."

Answer: Nothing

Nothing happens when he kisses Aeryn, and Stark says, "Hey! I know. Maybe you have to do more than just kiss her. Maybe "kiss" is a metaphor for showing her a really good time. Yeah, and maybe Chiana has to kiss her. Huh? Can I watch? I love to watch." Creepy. John realizes that Aeryn is not the princess, to which she responds by saying, "Well, I'm not the princess you seek.

But we could still have a really good time." Stark says, "This is my world, meat. You're just walking through it for a very long time.

When your body is dead, your mind will live here with us to strut and fret forever. You poor player." John jumps out the window and restarts the game.

Answer: Zhaan

John finds the male Zhaan and cuts him open ("Bring forth the sword and through the darkness peek"). This reveals the real Zhaan, who tells John that Stark wishes to keep him there because he blames him for her death ("The one a human's fleeting love did rend").

She asks what he would have of her, "A kiss? Have you wasted my death and the deaths of so many others?" John says he doesn't know and she says, "Then I suggest you find out, before anyone else dies for the love of you."