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Quiz about Animal Advice from Aunt Agnes

Animal Advice from Aunt Agnes Trivia Quiz

Aunt Agnes writes an advice column for all the animal kingdom. She's overloaded with letters- can you help her answer a few?

A multiple-choice quiz by crisw. Estimated time: 8 mins.

Author
crisw

Time
8 mins

Type
Multiple Choice

Quiz #
185,020

Updated
Dec 03 21

# Qns
10

Difficulty
Difficult

Avg Score
4 / 10

Plays
4990

Awards
Top 35% Quiz

Last 3 plays: Guest 69 (2/10), Johnmcmanners (10/10), wjames (6/10).

One at a Time - Single Page - Timed Game

Question 1 of 10

1. Dear Aunt Agnes,
Like any manly male moth, I want to hit it off with the ladies. But I'll confess...I'm not sure who the ladies are! I'm afraid that when I was a caterpillar, my parents didn't offer such instruction. How do I tell the difference without asking them?
Signed,
Confused in Coccoonville Hint

Dear Confused: I'm afraid to tell you this...but there are no female moths.

Dear Confused: Well, usually the ladies like to dress in finer wear than the men- plus there's a certain gleam in their eyes!

Dear Confused: Check out their shapely legs, and see if they stick their tongues out at you.

Dear Confused: Look at their antennae, not their thorax! A good whiff of their perfume helps too.

NEXT>

Question 2 of 10

2. Dear Agnes,
I am writing you all the way from Australia, looking for some tips on interior design. I'm a bowerbird, you see, and I've built what I consider to be a fantastic pad. But all the girls are ignoring me. It must be my decor. What is in for bowerbird Sheilas this year?
Sincerely,
Depressed Down Under Hint

Dear Depressed: A bit of moss should catch their fancy.

Dear Depressed: When only the best will do, try emu feathers.

Dear Depressed: Show you're a good provider- decorate your house with lots of snail shells and insect carapaces.

Dear Depressed: Don't be blue- just try blue!

NEXT>

Question 3 of 10

3. Dear Agnes,
Like any grouper, I want a chance to make little baby groupers. I want to hear the sound of little fins in my ocean space! But when I look around me, all I see are other female groupers with the same aim. And there are just no eligible males in sight. What do I do? I'm not getting any younger!
Signed,
Guy Grouper Groupie Hint

Dear Groupie, Try some scented cologne to attract the big boys.

Dear Groupie, Didn't you know that you don't need a guy to have some fishlets?

Dear Groupie, You can become a parent- just become male!

Dear Groupie, You'll just need to prepare yourself for a long migration.

NEXT>

Question 4 of 10

4. Dear Agnes,
I'm one pooped phalarope. My wife dresses much fancier than I do. She often leaves me at home to care for the eggs while she has a night on the town...and I think it might be with other guys! I am becoming the laughingstock of shorebird society. What do I do?
Signed,
Henpecked Hint

Dear Henpecked, Sorry to tell you this, but that's just life for phalaropes.

Dear Henpecked, Don't worry, she's really faithful only to you.

Dear Henpecked, Don't you think that it's time that you went out and got a harem of your own?

Dear Henpecked, Are you sure she's a she?

NEXT>

Question 5 of 10

5. Dear Agnes,
How does a nice earthworm meet another of the opposite sex?
Signed,
Fishin' For Mates Hint

Dear Fishin', Try hanging out in the best pile of rotten leaves that you can find.

Dear Fishin', The ladies are lighter, and a bit slimier too!

Dear Fishin', Look for a worm with fewer segments than you- that's the one!

Dear Fishin', Stop lookin' for the opposite sex...because there aren't any!

NEXT>

Question 6 of 10

6. Dear Agnes,
As chimpanzees go, I'm kinda puny. The big guys can run around and look tough- they sound tough too! So they get all the girls. Some of the girls think I'm cute, but if the big guys see me putting the moves on a cute chick...pow! What do I do?
Signed,
Wimpy Chimp Hint

Dear Wimpy- Stand up to the big guys! Fight for your right to party!

Dear Wimpy- You know those big red fruit you like? Eat more of them!

Dear Wimpy- You just may have to give it up and move in with the baboons.

Dear Wimpy- Hang out behind a big rock...if you're cute, the gals will find you!

NEXT>

Question 7 of 10

7. Dear Agnes,
I'm a blue whale expecting a blessed event. How long do I have to wait before I hear the sounds of little flippers?
Signed,
Anxious in Antarctica Hint

Dear Anxious, In about two years, you'll have a cute little cetacean!

Dear Anxious, In 17 months, expect lots of congratulations from the marine set!

Dear Anxious, Can you believe that only 8 months from now you'll be a big mama?

Dear Anxious, About 11 months from now, you'll have a bouncing blubber baby!

NEXT>

Question 8 of 10

8. Dear Agnes,
Like any other garden snail, I enjoy a nice long courtship, with lots of flirting and nibbling. But "he"- I use "he" because I'm sure you know we are hermaphrodites- insists on firing sharp darts at me! So I fire back, naturally- but why are we doing this?
Signed,
Pained in Peoria
Hint

Dear Pained, Hate to tell you this, but I don't think "he" likes you

Dear Pained, Your partner is trying to ensure that your babies are "his"

Dear Pained, "He" wants to tie himself to you- for life!

Dear Pained, Get away! "He" isn't really your kind- he's a vicious predator

NEXT>

Question 9 of 10

9. Dear Agnes,
I think I'm a pretty handsome wolf spider, and I know a nice girl who lives under a branch up the street. But the females of my species are kind of known for eating their mates. I don't really want to become dinner- what do I do?
Signed,
Want to Stay Alive Hint

Dear Alive, It's pretty simple. Just get to know her well- from a distance!- before you put the moves on her.

Dear Alive, Bring her presents. A nice juicy fly will cool her temper.

Dear Alive, Sorry, but if you want to have a little fling, you have to be prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice.

Dear Alive, You can make that silk for a purpose you know...tie her up!

NEXT>

Question 10 of 10

10. Dear Agnes,
I'm a frazzled fruit fly. My husband is always begging me for more, but I just don't feel like making whoopee. Is it just that I'm too tired from tending to our brood of lovely maggots or what?
Signed,
Disinclined Drosophila Hint

Dear Disinclined- Try papaya. It works.

Dear Disinclined- Blame it on your husband- it's all his fault!

Dear Disinclined- You need more exercise. You have to fly before you can...you know.

Dear Disinclined- After the maggots have grown and flown away, you will really want to play!

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Quiz Answer Key and Fun Facts

1. Dear Aunt Agnes, Like any manly male moth, I want to hit it off with the ladies. But I'll confess...I'm not sure who the ladies are! I'm afraid that when I was a caterpillar, my parents didn't offer such instruction. How do I tell the difference without asking them? Signed, Confused in Coccoonville

Answer: Dear Confused: Look at their antennae, not their thorax! A good whiff of their perfume helps too.

You see, Confused, those female moths prefer a simple hairdo. While your antennae are big and bushy (the better to catch a whiff of their special perfume- sometimes you can smell it from miles away!) theirs are smooth. Good luck with the girls from now on!

2. Dear Agnes, I am writing you all the way from Australia, looking for some tips on interior design. I'm a bowerbird, you see, and I've built what I consider to be a fantastic pad. But all the girls are ignoring me. It must be my decor. What is in for bowerbird Sheilas this year? Sincerely, Depressed Down Under

Answer: Dear Depressed: Don't be blue- just try blue!

You see, Depressed, the gals want to see your blue period.Anything blue. Bottlecaps, marbles, flowers (just toss them out once they start to wilt!), pebbles- just make it blue and they'll come to you.

3. Dear Agnes, Like any grouper, I want a chance to make little baby groupers. I want to hear the sound of little fins in my ocean space! But when I look around me, all I see are other female groupers with the same aim. And there are just no eligible males in sight. What do I do? I'm not getting any younger! Signed, Guy Grouper Groupie

Answer: Dear Groupie, You can become a parent- just become male!

You sound like you're one of the big fish in the pond, Groupie. And you have lots of female company. So why not do what comes naturally to your kind- just turn into a male! Most groupers do this when they get a bit old and there aren't any eligible bachelors around.

4. Dear Agnes, I'm one pooped phalarope. My wife dresses much fancier than I do. She often leaves me at home to care for the eggs while she has a night on the town...and I think it might be with other guys! I am becoming the laughingstock of shorebird society. What do I do? Signed, Henpecked

Answer: Dear Henpecked, Sorry to tell you this, but that's just life for phalaropes.

Mr. Hen, I am afraid you are one of nature's anomalies. Your wife is bigger and brighter than you, and likes to chase the guys around. I have even worse news- pretty soon she's going to migrate south for the winter, and leave you to care for your chicks- alone. That's the way it is for your species. Blame Darwin.

5. Dear Agnes, How does a nice earthworm meet another of the opposite sex? Signed, Fishin' For Mates

Answer: Dear Fishin', Stop lookin' for the opposite sex...because there aren't any!

You see, Fishin'- you are a hermaphrodite! That's good news for you...any worm that you meet can be the right one! Here's hoping you have a nice clutch of eggs real soon now!

6. Dear Agnes, As chimpanzees go, I'm kinda puny. The big guys can run around and look tough- they sound tough too! So they get all the girls. Some of the girls think I'm cute, but if the big guys see me putting the moves on a cute chick...pow! What do I do? Signed, Wimpy Chimp

Answer: Dear Wimpy- Hang out behind a big rock...if you're cute, the gals will find you!

You see, Wimpy, the gals of your species can be pretty choosy themselves. They don't want to get the big guys riled up either, though. So if you just pick a nice little bachelor pad behind a rock, they'll come to you! Scientists call your kind "sneaker males"- and it isn't because of your footwear!

7. Dear Agnes, I'm a blue whale expecting a blessed event. How long do I have to wait before I hear the sounds of little flippers? Signed, Anxious in Antarctica

Answer: Dear Anxious, About 11 months from now, you'll have a bouncing blubber baby!

Dearie, the elephant has to wait almost two years for her baby- you only have to wait as long as a horse! And look at what a baby you get!

8. Dear Agnes, Like any other garden snail, I enjoy a nice long courtship, with lots of flirting and nibbling. But "he"- I use "he" because I'm sure you know we are hermaphrodites- insists on firing sharp darts at me! So I fire back, naturally- but why are we doing this? Signed, Pained in Peoria

Answer: Dear Pained, Your partner is trying to ensure that your babies are "his"

Pained, life can be rough for snails. You and your partner both make those darts from calcium in your bodies, then coat them with a special chemical. That chemical prevents your partner from digesting your sperm. Without it, 99.98% of your sperm would become food rather than baby snails!

9. Dear Agnes, I think I'm a pretty handsome wolf spider, and I know a nice girl who lives under a branch up the street. But the females of my species are kind of known for eating their mates. I don't really want to become dinner- what do I do? Signed, Want to Stay Alive

Answer: Dear Alive, It's pretty simple. Just get to know her well- from a distance!- before you put the moves on her.

I can't guarantee that you won't become the second course, but the females of your species prefer affairs with males that they know, rather than strangers. Maybe if you're a familiar sight she knows you've stayed alive long enough to be fit and healthy!

10. Dear Agnes, I'm a frazzled fruit fly. My husband is always begging me for more, but I just don't feel like making whoopee. Is it just that I'm too tired from tending to our brood of lovely maggots or what? Signed, Disinclined Drosophila

Answer: Dear Disinclined- Blame it on your husband- it's all his fault!

You see, Disinclined, your husband doesn't want you fooling around with any handsome male who flies your way. So he slipped a little drug into his sperm...and it makes you not-so-ready for more. It's nice when it's the guy's fault, isn't it?

Source: Author crisw

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