An All-Conkering Competition Trivia Quiz

Answer: Smashed to smithereens

From clue 2 we know that Ashton Root's losing conker didn't fall off its string and was defeated after taking just 1 hit, therefore it couldn't have been disqualified as that one lasted 24 hits (clue 1). Finally, clue 4 indicates that the player who retired hurt had a longer surname than another player, so couldn't have been Ashton Root. So the conker in question must have been smashed to smithereens.

The game of conkers developed in the early to mid-19th century in England and involves two players battling each other with horse chestnuts attached to a bit of string. This unlikely sounding entertainment quickly developed into a popular children's game and became a ubiquitous sight on autumnal school playgrounds. The rules are simple: each person threads their horse chestnut (or 'conker') onto a piece of string and then take turns to hit their opponent's conker with their own; the first person to have their conker destroyed is the loser.

Answer: No

The four first-round winners were Holly Bush (from clue 3), Rowan Woods (also clue 3), Willow Forester (clue 4) and Hazel Hawthorn (clue 5). Therefore Laurel was one of the four losing players.

Aside from its long history as a children's game, conkers has also become a more formal competitive sport with a World Championships held annually in a village in Northamptonshire. The first official event was contested in 1965 and won by a man named R.W. Marsh - although history has unfortunately failed to record any further information on this pioneering sporting champion. A junior competition was added to the programme in 1986, a ladies competition began in 1988 and a team event was first contested in 1992.

Answer: 24

Hazel's match can't have lasted just 1 or 4 hits as clue 5 states that it lasted longer than the two matches involving Rowan Woods and Laurel Barker. Clue 5 also states that Oliver Vine's match lasted 7 hits, so Hazel's must have taken 24.

Generally the competitor with the hardest conker will win a game and various techniques for hardening conkers have therefore been developed, ranging from soaking them in vinegar to an oven-roasting procedure. To ensure fairness the organisers of the World Championship therefore supply all the conkers used in the competition and ban entrants from using their own treated and honed specimens. Although the players take it in turns to attack, it is not always the attacker that will win the match; many conkers held in the defensive position can - and have - obliterated their attackers on impact.

Answer: Laurel Barker

The four losing players were: Laurel Barker (question 2), Ashton Root (clue 2), Kiefer Birch and Oliver Vine (clue 3). Ashton Root and Oliver Vine can be ruled out as their matches lasted 1 hit (clue 2) and 7 hits (clue 5) respectively. Laurel Barker's match was shorter than some of the others (also clue 5) so she has to be the player that lost after 4 hits.

The whole competition at the annual World Conker Championship is concluded on a single day and is designed as a family-friendly day out. In recent years the various rounds, culminating in the grand final, have taken place in front of hundreds of spectators and amidst a range of other entertainment, such as traditional Morris dancing displays, live music and even juggling workshops (not necessarily with conkers)! Money raised from the event has traditionally been donated to a range of charities related to helping blind and visually impaired people.

Answer: Holly Bush

As previously noted, the four first-round winners were Holly Bush, Rowan Woods, Willow Forester and Hazel Hawthorn. Question 1 tells us that it was Ashton Root's conker that was smashed to smithereens and clue 2 states that his opponent was not Rowan Woods. Clue 5 indicates that it also couldn't have been either Willow Forester or Hazel Hawthorn as the conker smasher's surname had to be shorter than theirs. That just leaves Holly Bush.

The origins of the name 'conkers' for the game are shrouded in mystery. Before horse chestnuts were adopted as the weapon of choice, early versions of the game were played with hazelnuts or snail shells (hopefully minus the snail itself). The French word 'conque' ('shell' in English) has been proposed as one possible origin, while another suggestion was that it simply derived from the word 'conquer' given the ultimate aim of the game. One last possibility is that it is an onomatopoeic description of the sound made by two horse chestnuts being smashed together...

Answer: Fell off string and trodden on

Smashed to smithereens can be ruled out as the fate of Oliver Vine's conker as that one belonged to Ashton Root (question 1). It can't have been disqualified as that one lasted 24 hits (clue 1) whilst Oliver's only lasted 7 (clue 5). Oliver also can't have retired hurt as that player had a longer surname than Ashton Root (clue 4 and question 1). Therefore Oliver's conker must have fallen off its string and been trodden on.

The rules of the World Conker Championship state that one conker must be smashed for victory to be declared. If a conker somehow becomes detached from its string without being smashed to bits it is within the rules for the player to retrieve it, re-secure it to the string and continue the match. However, if the conker in question has been trodden underfoot it becomes impossible to re-thread and the match must be conceded. Other important rules include the fact that if both conkers are smashed simultaneously then a re-match should be called and any player who repeatedly misses their opponent's conker and ends up knotting the conker strings together faces disqualification.

Answer: 4

It was the disqualification that occurred after 24 hits (clue 1) and the match that was completed after 1 hit was the one where Ashton Root's conker was smashed to smithereens (clue 2 and question 1) - so this leaves either 4 hits or 7 hits. From clue 5 and the answer to question 6 we know that Oliver Vine's match lasted 7 hits and he lost his match after his conker fell off its string and was trodden on. So the player who retired hurt must have done so after 4 hits.

In recent years, the game of conkers has suffered from fears over health and safety and been banned from numerous school playgrounds across Britain. However, given that it has existed for over 150 years without a large number of deaths or major injuries being associated with it, it seems unlikely that it has suddenly become a particularly dangerous past-time. Other fears relate to the danger the conkers might pose to children with nut allergies as touching conkers (particularly the broken shards) can cause a rash. It is probably important though that all potential conker competitors are warned of the dangers of eating their weapons - horse chestnuts should not be confused for ordinary chestnuts as they are toxic, inedible and definitely should not be roasted over an open fire.

Answer: Willow Forester

Since Laurel Barker lost her match (question 2), her opponent must have been one of the previously identified first-round winners: Holly Bush, Rowan Woods, Willow Forester or Hazel Hawthorn. Laurel cannot have competed against either Rowan Woods or Hazel Hawthorn as their matches were both longer than hers (clue 5). To decide between Holly Bush and Willow Forester, we need to look at the match Laurel was involved in and from question 4 and question 7 we know that Laurel retired hurt from her match that lasted 4 hits. Holly Bush was involved in the match where the losing conker was smashed to smithereens (question 5), so Laurel must have been defeated by Willow Forester.

There are a whole range of alternative uses for the conkers of disillusioned conker competitors. They can be tied up next to windows or doors to deter spiders from entering buildings (the conker string comes in handy here), fed to horses or cattle, used as a moth repellent in wardrobes or supposedly even carried around in clothing to prevent rheumatism and haemorrhoids!

Answer: True

From clue 5 and question 6 we know that Oliver Vine lost his match after 7 hits when his conker fell off its string and was trodden on. Of the four match winners (Holly Bush, Willow Forester, Hazel Hawthorn and Rowan Woods), Hazel Hawthorn's match lasted 24 hits (question 3), Holly Bush smashed her opponent's conker to smithereens (question 5) and Willow Forester competed against Laurel Barker (question 8). That means it was true that Rowan Woods was Oliver Vine's opponent.

If you've had enough of conkers by this point then you might want to try out the range of video games featuring Conker the Squirrel - although you might also want to make sure any kids you know continue with the traditional nut-based game since Conker is noted for his use of foul language, violence, drug use and drunkenness. The series includes titles such as 'Conker's Pocket Tales' and 'Conker's Bad Fur Day'. However, if you still want to get out into the open air and indulge in a game of conkers then make sure you get to your nearest horse chestnut tree before any local squirrels - they have a thing for hoarding and eating them.

Answer: Kiefer Birch

Of the four losing players (Laurel Barker, Kiefer Birch, Ashton Root and Oliver Vine), Laurel Barker retired hurt (questions 4 and 7), Ashton Root's conker was smashed to smithereens (question 1) and Oliver Vine's fell off its string and was trodden on (question 6). So the nefarious cheat must have been Kiefer Birch.

In case you hadn't noticed while puzzling through this logic problem, the names of all the fictitious conker contestants are related to trees. Some connections are more obvious than others though, so I should probably note that the name Kiefer (as made famous by the Canadian actor Kiefer Sutherland and the German tennis player Nicolas Kiefer) is German for pine.

The full solution was as follows:
Hazel Hawthorn defeated Kiefer Birch - 24 hits - disqualified
Holly Bush defeated Ashton Root - 1 hit - smashed into smithereens
Willow Forester defeated Laurel Barker - 4 hits - player retired hurt
Rowan Woods defeated Oliver Vine - 7 hits - fell off string and trodden on