Anything Goes Number Eight Trivia Quiz

Answer: Lady in a Bath

The bleeding heart is one of the most delicate, beautiful plants you could ever hope to see. A member of the poppy family, this beauty is native to Siberia, China and Japan, so trying to grow it in the hot climate of countries such as Australia is an uphill task. They usually die, alas. This truly is an exquisite flower. It can grow to be almost four foot high - in colder climates. The unique shape of this flower as it droops naturally upside down off its branches really does look like a heart, with a droplet forming at its base, but turn it upside down and you can see why its other popular name is lady-in-a-bath. The similarity is remarkable.

TIP: Never take a gift of these sweet flowers to someone recovering from a heart attack in hospital - as my non-gardening daughter once accidentally did.

Answer: Hot spiced ale

Lamb's wool was basically hot spiced ale. Included in the large bowl of ale (or perhaps "ail" if it gave you a hangover) were burst apples, sugar and various spices. If left to stand some time prior to serving, that would have been quite a potent drink. Nobody is quite sure of the origins of the name of this drink.

Some believe it was associated with an old Irish pagan festival called "Lamas Ubhal", while others believe the appearance of the drink is similar to that of lamb's wool. It is presumed that this is in reference to the froth on top of the ale as it was passed around in a large communal bowl.

Answer: Their own knife and spoon

Etiquette rules were really quite strict when eating with Tudor monarchs. Seating around tables went in descending order of rank from the king's table. Everyone had to bring his or her own knife and spoon (forks were considered a fancy nonsensical foreign fad). Nobody must look the monarch in the eye. Linen napkins were provided for the higher up guests and these had to be draped over the left shoulder. Because salt was so costly, it was only ever seen on the monarch's table. Each diner had to use his own spoon to obtain helpings from serving dishes, and that spoon had to be wiped clean with his bread before dipping into another communal dish. When helping themselves to meat (and there were an astonishing array of meats at these feasts), each diner was only allowed to touch the piece desired, before cutting it off with his or her own knife.

Hands had to be washed before and after eating, and usually between each course, and you could not take your seat if you hadn't washed. It was considered the height of poor etiquette to spill food on the table cloths. Last but not least, as Erasmus wrote in his 1534 "De Civitate", guests were expected to "sit neatly and still...(and not to) shift their buttocks left and right as if to let off some blast". So everything was covered, you could say, from top to...bottom.

Answer: Mahratta

Mahratta was a Brocklebank steamship that started her career when launched in 1917. She had a fine sailing record until one night in 1939, during a blackout, when she ran aground on the Godwin Sands in the English Channel, coming to rest on top of an earlier ship that had run aground in the same place in 1909.

A tugboat was sent to try to pull Mahratta into deeper water the following day, in order for salvage proceedings to take place, but her port side caved in, and she shortly afterwards broke in half.

Then, rather eerily, it was found that the earlier ship Mahratta had come to rest upon, was also a Brocklebank steamship. That ship's name? Mahratta. How's that for a weird coincidence?

Answer: Lace

Some people detest pineapple. They find the taste too tart, it puts the welcome mat out for hives, its really rough exterior can inflict quite deep cuts, and its spiky top is downright dangerous - but this is an interesting fruit all the same. Unlike other fruits, it never ripens any further than on the day it is harvested.

It is native to South America and wasn't introduced into Europe until the 17th century, but when it first made its way there, it wasn't used for consumption initially, but for display features in the middle of tables. You can grow another pineapple by putting the cut off top of an existing one in the ground (once you've retrieved your eyeball) and letting it develop from there. Pineapples take about a year to grow, and in Europe, they grow best in greenhouses.

The Philippines produces most of the world's pineapples today, and astonishingly so, the leaves of this spiky fruit are used there to produce some really lovely materials. This includes the most delicate and loveliest of laces.

Answer: Because he identified with their political rivals

First President of America, George Washington, lived from 1732 until 1799. He served as leader of the nation for 10 years (1789-1797), before, quite worn out for a lifetime devoted to his country, he retired. Washington identified with the Federalists Party at that time in American history, but that party lost to the Jeffersonian Democratic-Republician (what an oxymoron) Party in 1800. Unable to put politics aside to honour a great man, that party, taking petty to a whole new level, consequently vetoed the suggestion of a monument associated with their political rivals.

Construction of the (eventual) Washington Monument, so easily recognised today, did not get under way until 1848, but what with the American Civil War, lack of funds, and ongoing tiffs, this wasn't completed and open to the public until 1888. Buried below the cornerstone are assorted articles considered of interest to future generations, and at the very top of the monument, facing east, the words "Praise be to God" are inscribed. George Washington, who guided the colonies safely along the path to their great and glorious future, was the only American President ever elected unopposed to the office. That's a refreshing change.

Answer: Tiny Tim

Born Herbert Khaury in 1932, Tiny Tim was fascinated with music and singing all his life. He taught himself guitar at the age of six, became obsessed with records and sheet music (particularly music from the 1920s and 1930s) learned to play the violin, the mandolin and the ukulele (his later signature instrument) and, fascinated with the voice of Rudy Vallee, also discovered he could sing just as well in that top vocal register (falsetto). Hating high school, he skipped as many classes as possible, and started taking whatever singing jobs he could, entering talent quests, anything at all he could to perform. He also began wearing his hair long and bedraggled (he thought he looked like Rudolph Valentino) and wearing pure white make-up. This resulted in his mother, until his father stopped her, wanting to have her son examined by a psychiatrist.

Tim's big break came with his rendition of "Tip Toe Through the Tulips", a song forever after associated with his act, even though he was more than adept at singing any other numbers. He married three times (Miss Vicki, Miss Jan and Miss Sue), and managed to have one child with the famous Miss Vicki - a daughter he named Tulip Victoria. In a show of exceptional poor taste, when Miss Vicki lost a previous baby, very premature and stillborn, Tim erected a headstone over the small grave - engraved with the word "It". He appeared on many shows, and at clubs and concerts, and for a time was known to everybody, but, as with most novelty acts, his career eventually faded. At the age of 64, while performing at a gala benefit in Minneapolis, he collapsed half-way through tiptoeing through the tulips, and died soon after. He was buried with a tulip and his favourite ukulele. This performer was a real character, and most definitely made his audiences feel happy - but anything less like a canary, one couldn't possibly imagine.

Answer: Rodent ulcer

The basal-cell carcinoma is the most common form of skin cancer. It makes up eighty percent of these skin problems. Chances of developing this condition are increased by "exposure to ultraviolet light, having lighter skin, radiation therapy, long term exposure to arsenic and poor immune-system function" (Wikipedia). This condition starts out looking like a red patch on the skin, but if left untreated, the skin and underlying tissues is eaten away and it can spread over large areas of the skin. Treatment includes removal by standard surgery (but it should be noted that there is a high percentage of recurrence with this method); Mohs surgery, where more than the required area is removed; cryosurgery, which, when used with a temperature probe, has a high cure rate; scraping away the cancer with a round knife and burning the remaining skin with electric currents; and several other methods as well.

Once known as rodent ulcers, this name was applied to these facial lesions because the edges around the sores look at though they have been nibbled upon by rats. What a delightfully positive image to put into the head of a patient. You'll be delighted to learn, though, that this condition is curable and hardly ever leads to death - so put the rat poison away.

Answer: Chicken

Matilda had earned that title two years earlier in 2004, and was solemnly accorded the degree by the Guinness World Records, with same being solemnly recorded in its data base. Most chickens only live to be an average of seven to eight years before kicking the feeding trough, so Matilda really impressed all and sundry with her longevity. Owned by Keith and Donna Barton of Alabama, she was purchased from a breeder in Alabama by them in order to be part of their amateur magician show. For the next ten years of her life, she had a successful stage act of being pulled out of a hat. She was also a guest on "The Tonight Show" with Jay Leno in 2004, where she behaved herself impeccably and did a perfect take off of the NBC peacock.

Poor old Matilda, when she wasn't performing on stage, was never allowed to roam free and wild on any property though. She was far too valuable for that. Instead, she was kept in a roomy steel cage in the home of her owners. Perhaps this impacted her ovaries, who knows, for Matilda never once laid an egg in her entire life. This raises the question of whether she was a Matilda or a Matthew. Upon her death in 2006, her owners put Matilda in frozen storage until a suitable resting place in Alabama to honour her achievements could be found. But I'm sure you'll agree that if Matilda was asked about all this fuss, she would probably say it was all for the birds, and a lot of clucking nonsense.

Answer: Perfumed gloves

This intriguing fashion possibly had a very sensible rationale behind it. What with open sewers and lack of other hygiene practices at this time in history, life was rather pongy at times. For a great deal of the time, instead of the ruling authorities dealing with the cause of this issue, it was much easier instead to carry small bunches of herbs, or sprinkle these around on floors and in bedrooms to disguise the odours. The fashion of wearing perfumed gloves, where scents could be swept through the air simply by gesturing, is thought to have started in Italy, and introduced to England by the Earl of Oxford who brought back a pair of these to present to Queen Elizabeth I in 1575.

When this fashion took off, it created a lot of employment for traders in the flower trade, for manufacturers of the gloves (VERY detailed process), and for vendors of same - and the fashion continued for a couple of centuries. Each set of gloves could take up to a month to thoroughly perfume, because the scents had to sink through the very fibres of the material used. Perfumes used included jonquil, frangipani, orange, violet, narcissus, roses and Jasmine. More solid perfumes added to the gloves included amber, musk and civet. Manufacturers could make a fortune in this trade. Would it be possible, then, one wonders, to start a fashion of perfumed socks? I know a few people who could use them.