Which Hobby? Excuses, Excuses! Quiz

Answer: Astronomy

Sirius is a very bright star. Now in regard to Herbert, I am not sure he is so bright, because he cannot spell "serious." But that is ok. I will find him a different hobby. He DID tell me to "give him some space" so I thought he meant he wanted a telescope!

(Thanks to "www.astronomytrek.com/astronomy-jokes-and-humour/" for the Sirius joke. Astronomy hobbies include stars which includes Sirius, also known as "the Dog Star." The word "Sirius" is a homonym for "serious.")

Answer: Sewing

Oh, Herbert, sorry to needle you this way, but again you spelled "seems" wrong. "Seams" are when you put together two pieces of fabric... oh. I get it! If sewing is not for you, Herbert, then we will find you a different hobby.

(This pun was mine. Seams are stitched areas in sewing where two pieces of fabric are sewn, and "seams" is a homonym of "seems".)

Answer: Golf

Herbert! You don't have to drive a golf cart to play golf! You just need to hit a ball with a golf club - we call it "drive a golf ball" - ... oh. Good one, Herbert. But that is ok. We will go "FORE!"-ward and keep trying.

(Thanks to "www.punoftheday.com/" for the pun "Your golf addiction is driving a wedge between us" which inspired Herbert's excuse on this one. Golfers use a club to hit a ball a long distance, which is called "driving." The excuse about not being able to drive is usually referring to a car. Hence it is FUNNY. I must insist.)

Answer: Hairstyling

Herbert! That is a horrible pun! And I got it the first time I read it, this time! Well, no need to die, or even dye. I will keep trying to find you a stylish hobby.

(Thanks to Chris Johnson on "http://j-walk.com/puns/hairpuns.htm" for the "Curled up and dyed" pun on hair styling, which inspired Herbert's excuse on this one. Hair Stylists cut and dye hair, and "dye" is a homonym of "die" which was implied in the excuse.)

Answer: Jogging

Umm... Herbert, do you mean you ran too slow? Or you ran out of sync? Either way, I get it, Herbert. Running is not for you. Don't get your laces in a knot! We can find a hobby that suits you.

(This one was my pun. "Ran" is associated with joggers, and "time is often a factor in running races. So Herbert's excuse was a double reference to running/jogging. "Running out of time" is an expression which means not getting something done in an allotted time.)

Answer: Origami

But, Herbert, origami means "the art of paper folding!" Of course your club folded. They would do a lot of folding! Oh...the CLUB folded. Poor Herbert - out there on the mean streets without a club. Well, stay safe, and we will keep trying.

(Thanks to "www.britishorigami.info/fun/orijokes.php" for the pun on origami businesses. "To fold" is an expression which means to go out of business. Origami is the art of paper folding. It's a joke. They had a lot of good origami jokes on that web site. You might want to check it out.)

Answer: Snow Skiing

But, Herbert, you are supposed to go downhill on skis! Or did you mean that your enthusiasm went downhill? OK, don't get your skis in a twist. We can keep trying. We will find a hobby for you!

(Thanks to Stuart Kenny's article "Snow Puns So bad you'll want to melt and evaporate into thin air" for the downhill joke. Skiers often ski downhill, and the expression "to go downhill fast" means to decline in enthusiasm or skill.)

Answer: Doing Math Puzzles

What? Herbert, you can't get 2/10 for every puzzle! Oh... "too tense." Haha! Good one, Herbert. You know, Herb, math jokes are a sign that you have gone over to the dark side, where nerdiness dwells. Not judging, here, though!

(As a math teacher, I hear many math jokes, and this one I heard MANY years ago. I tried to find a source on the internet to give credit to someone since the pun is not mine originally. But alas, I could not find it. So to whomever told me this joke MANY years ago, THANKS! The mathematical fraction "2/10", said out loud sounds like "too tense," and being "too tense" is an excuse for many things. The actual math joke I had heard was along the lines of "Why did the decimal 0.2 have to see a psychiatrist?" Har har. Those fractions kill me!)

Answer: Surfing

Well, of course you need a board to surf, Herbert! You mean "A board," right? Or maybe you are punning me, and found surfing boring? Throw a shark in there, and you would not be board...I mean, "bored." I am shore you would not.

(Thanks for the pun inspiration at "www.reddit.com/r/boardgames/comments" from KingJalopy - he was talking about getting his wife on board playing board games, but it helped me find an excuse for Herbert. Surfing uses surf boards, and "bored" is a homonym for "bored." Being bored is an excuse used all the time, especially by school kids during summer vacation. Since surfing is often a summer sport, that makes it FUNNY. Are you board yet?)

Answer: Gardening

Herbert, if you garden then you will get plants on your hands. That makes no sense. Unless, you meant "time?" Thyme! I get it! Oh you silly person, Herbert! I get it. You did not dig gardening. It did not grow on you. What? You say to leaf you alone? I will then... for a while.

(Thanks to "http://memebase.cheezburger.com/puns/tag/thyme" for the thyme pun. Thyme is an herb, and the word is a homonym for "time." Don't pronounce the TH as thigh-mmm. Really. It is pronounced "time." Are you still reading? Just checking. "Having too much time on my hands" is an expression which may mean "I am bored." Gardeners may grow thyme, since it is a plant. I would go on, but I am out of thyme.)