Why Punish Me, Hera? Trivia Quiz

Answer: Alcmene

Dear Alcmene,

I agree that you were fooled by this scoundrel Zeus. He didn't foresee that your real hubby would come back the same night from this war and you would mention his first visit! You got pregnant from your legal spouse with another son that very same night, isn't that strange? Alas, you have to wait a bit. Your uncle by marriage Sthenelus is expecting some offspring, too. His wife is in her seventh month of pregnancy. Zeus and I have a bet whoever is born first will rule. But I will give you the favour and will see that Eurystheus is born now. This will be a bit early, but he will be fine.

With the best wishes,
Hera


PS: Better take good care of the Zeus brat. I am still angry!

Answer: Heracles

Heracles - or shall I call you Alcaeus-

I don't have a reason for being angry with you?

It isn't only that Zeus strayed again. Oh no. Your half-sister Athena brought you to me and, being kind to a poor "motherless" child, I acted as a wet-nurse for you. You bit me! I spilled some milk and now the sky is stained by the milky way.

That shows your temper, my dear. I won't mention the killing of your lyre teacher, and now you are blaming me that you silly chunky bloke had most likely a cup too much and killed your kids. Sometimes I really wish your mum and your stepfather hadn't changed your name to honor me, Heracles.

With disgust,
Hera

PS: Really, you should try a bit of real labor. Ask your kinsman Eurystheus.

Answer: No

Dear Leto,

I don't want to boast, but this was a good idea of mine with the floating island. No firm ground. I hope it was not too wobbly there when you gave birth at last?
Hera is livid! With all the best wishes for the future.

Keep the faith,
Zeus

PS: I will look after our twins Apollo and Artemis, don't worry.

Answer: bound on a wheel eternally

Ixion,

How dare you write to me in that way? You, who murdered his own father-in-law - and to make it even worse, he was your guest.

Despite this, Zeus felt sorry for you and invited you to the Olymp. True: it is nice for me to see that Zeus is jealous when other men get too interested in me - but the greatest mistake you made, Ixion: guests don't leer after their host's wives. When you fell for my cloudy double Nephele you showed a blatant disrespect for your host. It was quite alright that you were bound on the big wheel on fire and have to keep on turning!

Don't stop rolling,
Hera

PS: I heard yours and Nephele's son Centauros has fathered, with some mares, a nice herd of grandchildren for you. They are really cute: half horse, half human. Congratulations, Ixion.

Answer: half snake, half woman

My dear poor Lamia,

Stop telling the story that I killed your children, even if Zeus is one of the fathers. I only took them away from you. A kind of revenge, I have to admit. But who could have guessed that you would go mad about it and start devouring children?

Chill down,
Hera

PS: I know that you can't close your eyes and therefore you have to take them out to get some sleep. I enclose a nice sleep mask in peacock design. My bird, you know. You will look much nicer that way.

Answer: She ignited and burnt to ashes

Dearest beloved Zeus,

The blame lies solely with you and this foolish Semele.

Every simple wine-grower wouldn't be so foolish to promise a girl to give her everything she asks for. And what did you do? Promised on the river Styx to fulfill her every wish. I guess you hoped to get away with some golden sandals and nice jewels. Or gherkins with honey, pregnant women sometimes have strange cravings.

And every mortal with just a grain of sense knows that it is deadly to look at you in all your glory equipped with thunderstorm and lightning bolts.

Love and kisses,
Hera

PS: Some little bird told me that you rescued Semele's baby and sewed it into your thigh. Is it true you want to call him Dionysus?

Answer: Paris

Paris,

Athena asked me to answer for both of us.

Stop whining and complaining. Why take Aphrodite's offer of granting you Helen at all? You yourself were married to Oenone and Helen to Menelaus. You could expect that this meant trouble. I now understand why Athena tried to bribe you with wisdom. You are in dire need of it. And it may be good that you didn't take my bribe of given you immense power. You only would have misused it.

May the force not be with you,
Hera

PS: And don't complain about our interfering. Didn't I see Ares himself fighting for your army?

Answer: Bear

Dear Callisto,

I recognize your plight, but believe me: you are better off staying a bear.
At least Zeus will leave you alone. Your son Arcas is a big boy now and an ardent hunter. Better stay away from him.

Yours sincerely

Hera

PS: I just learned that my advice was too late. Luckily Zeus placed you and your son in the sky before the worst could happen. People are now calling you Ursa Major and Ursa Minor.

Answer: Yes

Hello Zeus,

At last. It is good to be able to write again. I am pricked all over from this horrid gadfly. It is quite nice here in Egypt, and the king here, Telegonus, asked me out for a date. He likes my milkshakes.

Yours,
Io

PS: Could you ask Hera to send me the stuff I left behind when I had to quit my post as one of her priestesses? She can't be angry anymore.

Answer: Echo

Dear Echo,

Stop prattling. Do you really think Zeus used his time just to play cards with the girls? You helped him! And no. I will not forgive you.

With kind regards,
Hera

PS: Stay away from Narcissus. He only loves himself and he will not be good for you.