Veterinarian's Hospital Trivia Quiz

Answer: Fozzie

Veterinarian's Hospital makes its first appearance in episode 105 of "The Muppet Show". In the first season the show would be introduced as being the story of "a former orthopedic surgeon gone to the dogs". This was later changed to "a quack gone to the dogs".

In this first episode the team treats fellow performer Fozzie. Nurse Janice is late and explains she was "operating in the other booth". Dr. Bob then comments, "It's the talk of the hospital." Fozzie is rather reluctant to be treated, but Nurse Janice explains that Dr. Bob is the only one who can save him. Dr. Bob mentions that he "has saved 500 last year", this being dollars, not patients. He even lost over 100 pounds (not in weight, but in England).

Answer: Duck

There is a lot of confusion on the show when the team think they are treating a chicken, but it really is a duck. The animal keeps yelling "Duck" in correction, causing everyone to duck under the operating table. When Dr. Bob asks what kind of doctor the duck thinks he is, it quite truthfully replies with "Quack". Ducking does come in handy eventually, as in true Muppet fashion a lamp comes crashing down. Dr. Bob however thinks it is a trick again and gets hit by the fallen lamp.

Answer: Kermit

Behemoth complains of a "frog in his throat". In this case that should be taken quite literal, as it turns out that Kermit the Frog is found in his throat. Kermit is apparently not so pleased with his appearance, threatening to cancel the "dumb sketch".

The sketch is a good example of Dr. Bob's lack of proper patient care. He asks Nurse Piggy "what the patient is here for". When she replies "a stomach ache", he hits Behemoth in the stomach with a hammer.

Answer: Toast

This episode is a memorable one, as Dr. Bob discovers the concept of edible patients. Their patient turns out to be a loaf of bread, a very sick one, as the bread itself says. When Nurse Janice asks him "what he makes of it", Dr. Bob replies, "Toast." Dr. Bob appears somewhat late into the sketch, as a musician at the symphony fell through his harp.

When Nurse Piggy asks where he is now, Dr. Bob says, "In rooms 9, 10, 11 and 12."

Answer: Jaundice

This episode is very full of telephone jokes. Dr. Bob looks for a cure in the telephone book. When Nurse Piggy asks him "what he thinks it is", Dr. Bob replies: "it must be jaundice, look at all these yellow pages". Some of the other dialogues are the following:

Dr. "Bob: What is wrong with it?"
Nurse Janice: "It isn't working."
Dr. Bob: "Well tell it to get a job."

Nurse Janice: "Should the telephone have an anaesthetic?"
Dr. Bob: "Make it a local."
Nurse Janice: "Why?"
Dr. Bob: "Because long distance costs too much."
Dr. Bob: "Nurse Piggy, do you have the next line?"
Nurse Piggy: "I do, but I can't say it."
Dr. Bob: "Why not?"
Nurse Piggy: "Because the line is busy."

Answer: Bacon

In this sketch the operating team follows the Shakespeare theme that is in the entire episode of "The Muppet Show". They are treating a pig, or rather a piglet as Nurse Janice calls him. Dr. Bob immediately corrects her suggesting it isn't a piglet, but a hamlet, since they are doing Shakespeare. Nurse Janice says. "It sounds more like Bacon", making a reference to the author and philosopher Francis Bacon, but also to the pig.

When Dr. Bob asks for the patient's blood type, Nurse Janice says she thinks it is 2B, which prompts Dr. Bob to say that she should make up her mind, "2B or not 2B?". Dr. Bob sends the pig off with, "Alas poor pork, I know thee well." After the sketch, Statler says to Waldorf that he is really offended by the sketch as "he is a student of Shakespeare". Waldorf then corrects him by saying that he was actually "a student with Shakespeare".

Answer: Quicksand

In this sketch the team tries to operate on an older man. Nurse Janice says that he "is slipping fast". This is taken quite literally, when the patient actually sinks into the operating table. Nurse Piggy urges Dr. Bob with a "Quick!", so Dr. Bob replies, "Quick what?" and Nurse Piggy answers, "Quicksand."

What follows is a series of related puns. When Dr. Bob suggest the patient has slipping sickness, Nurse Piggy suggests he must have something else. Dr. Bob replies, "He better have, money for one thing, I don't make a cut, until I take my cut." When the patient has disappeared into the operating table, Dr. Bob asks for a hypodermic needle. When Nurse Janice asks why, he replies, "It's just a shot in the dark".

Answer: The entire team turns into chickens

In the entire episode of "The Muppet Show" a disease called Cluckitis has broken out. This causes the patients to sneeze and they turn into a chicken. This causes the Veterinarian Hospital sketch to be affected as well, with the entire team and the patient turning into chickens. So the introduction of the sketch is a little different, with Dr. Bob commenting that it is now a "dog that has gone to the quacks".

Their biggest worry for the sketch is that they might have to "work around the cluck".

Answer: Pigs in Space

In this episode Miss Piggy is featured in her usual role as first mate on the USS Swinetrek in "Pigs in Space". She suffers from hurt feet, as her shoes are too small. In the meantime the space ship is surrounded by an invisible shield. First Miss Piggy breaks through it, as she does not seem to care about anything other than her hurt feet. Next Dr. Bob and Nurse Janice simply walk in, causing the sketch to go horribly wrong.

When Dr. Strangepork says that "Miss Piggy is in big pain", Dr. Bob replies, "Of course she is a big pain, what else is new?" Miss Piggy then leaves in a huff. When the announcer of the sketch comes on, Dr. Bob comments, "You know, we have him at the hospital too."

Answer: Loretta Swit

In this episode Kermit actually fires Miss Piggy, after she has a rumour placed in a magazine that she and Kermit are secretly married. So guest star Loretta Swit, famous from the TV show "M*A*S*H*", fills in for Nurse Piggy. This causes Nurse Janice to comment that she has seen her face somewhere else, to which Loretta replies, "That can't be, my face has always been right where it is." Dr. Bob concludes that she qualifies to be in the sketch. Nurse Janice then remembers that she has seen Loretta on a show called "M*A*S*H*", saying that it is a dumb name for a show. Dr. Bob goes on to say, "My cousin was on a show called Mush." When Loretta asks if it had a long run, Dr. Bob says, "Yes, thanks to the Eskimo with the whip."