Love, Hilariously Trivia Quiz

Answer: The love Tony Blair has for George Bush

Hugh Grant played the British Prime Minister in "Love Actually", in which he famously stood up to the American President (portrayed by Billy Bob Thornton) in a scene near the end of the film. The scene and Grant's comments about love were directed at the growing criticism leveled against then Prime Minister Tony Blair over his unwavering (and, to some, unwarranted) support for President George W. Bush during the 2003 invasion of Iraq.

The unpopularity of Blair's position caused commentators to describe him as "Bush's poodle" and "the U.S. foreign minister". That same year, Swedish filmmaker Johan Söderberg assembled a satirical "cut-up" of video footage of Blair and Bush, making them appear to be singing "Endless Love" by Lionel Richie and Diana Ross to each other.

Answer: Ambrose Bierce

Ambrose Bierce was a prominent journalist, columnist and short story writer, and is probably best known for his 1911 work "The Devil's Dictionary", an abridged version of which was originally published as "The Cynic's Wordbook" in 1906. The dictionary offered alternative definitions of words that were imbued with Bierce's trademark wit and negativity, such as the characterization of "love" as a disease that is "curable by marriage". (In the same dictionary entry, he went on to observe that the condition was "sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient".) Bierce himself was evidently cured of his own affliction when he married Mary Ellen "Mollie" Day on Christmas Day, 1871. Unfortunately (or fortunately), the cure didn't last, and Bierce separated from his wife in 1888. Bierce has also been credited with saying: "Here's to woman. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands."

Answer: Henry "Henny" Youngman

Henny Youngman was a beloved comedian and entertainer, and was perhaps best known for the line, "Take my wife, please!" Although many of his jokes were told at the expense of his wife and his marriage (another one of his one-liners provided that "the secret of a happy marriage remains a secret"), Youngman was apparently incredibly devoted to his wife, Sadie, and remained married to her for over 60 years until her death in 1987.

He was also credited with saying, "You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it."

Answer: "with the heart filling up as the brain empties"

Jules Renard wrote numerous plays, short stories and novels, among them "Poil de carotte" and "Histoires naturelles". His "Journal" was published in 1925 after his death, and it eventually became highly regarded and celebrated in literary circles for its amusing and memorable observations on life. The book even inspired several well-known writers to follow in his example, including W. Somerset Maugham, who in 1949 published excerpts from his own journals as "A Writer's Notebook", which featured his own pithy saying about love: "Love is just a dirty trick played on us to achieve the continuation of the species."

Renard's observation, "Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties", was translated from this original French entry written on March 23rd, 1901: "L'amour tue l'intelligence. Le cerveau fait sablier avec le coeur. L'un ne se remplit que pour vider l'autre."

Answer: Joan Crawford

Joan Crawford was one of the biggest box-office draws in MGM's stable of stars in the 1930s, and appeared in such hits as "Our Dancing Daughters" (1928), "Grand Hotel" (1932) and "The Women" (1939). She won a Best Actress Oscar in 1946 for her portrayal of a devoted mother desperate to obtain the approval of her daughter in "Mildred Pierce" (1945). Sadly, her own real-life relationship with her eldest adopted daughter was strained to say the least, and after her death, her daughter, Christina, notoriously published a scandalous memoir containing allegations that she had suffered through years of physical and emotional abuse at the hands of her mother.

Answer: "smallpox"

Leave it to Woody Allen to come up with a funny yet accurate description about the sensation of falling in love that is also infused with the fatalistic twist that seems to pervade much of his humor. Most of Allen's films, including his more dramatic and tragic offerings, have a darkly comic thread running through them. Fans of the filmmaker often cite "Hannah and Her Sisters", "Crimes and Misdemeanors" and "Manhattan" as their favorites, and his 1977 film "Annie Hall" is one of the few comedies to win the Oscar for Best Picture. Apart from being a respected film auteur, Allen is also an accomplished jazz clarinettist and playwright.

Answer: Erich Segal

Erich Segal debunked the clichéd depiction of true love in the popular media with this humorous line, which read more like a public service announcement for sufferers of tinnitus. Interestingly, as the author of the 1970 novel "Love Story", Segal was responsible for a pop culture phenomenon that redefined the notion of romance for an entire generation.

The book was an instant bestseller, and spawned an equally successful film adaptation starring Ryan O'Neal and Ali MacGraw. The screenplay for the film was also written by Segal, who based the famous phrase, "Love means never having to say you're sorry", on a similar line from his novel.

Answer: finished

Actress Zsa Zsa Gabor began her film and television career in the 1950s, appearing mainly in supporting roles in films like "Lovely to Look At" (1952), "Lili" (1953) and "Death of a Scoundrel" (1953). She had a rare starring role with Jose Ferrer in "Moulin Rouge" (1952) and she won a special Golden Globe Award for "Most Glamorous Actress" in 1958.

Despite her successes in the film industry, Gabor is better remembered for her off-screen escapades, such as the 1989 incident in which she was jailed for slapping a police officer in Beverly Hills, as well as for her humorous quotes on marriage and relationships.

The above quote was recorded in a March, 1960 edition of "Newsweek", in which she also quipped, "Husbands are like fires - they go out when unattended."

Answer: Maurice Chevalier

The statement by Maurice Chevalier was quoted in "The Lover's Quotation Book" (1986), and appears to be a variation of an old proverb that dates back to the 16th century and which advises: "Never choose your women or your linen by candlelight." An accomplished performer, Chevalier was nominated for the Best Actor Oscar for his roles in "The Love Parade" (1929) and "The Big Pond" (1930), and he was presented with an Honorary Academy Award in 1959 "for his contributions to the world of entertainment for more than half a century" after his memorable turn in the successful movie musical "Gigi" (1958).

Answer: "the beginning of a life-long romance"

Irish playwright Oscar Wilde was renowned for his clever and sophisticated wit, and he had quite the talent for coining memorable epigrams. In 1894, he contributed an article titled "Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young" to an Oxford undergraduate magazine called "The Chameleon".

The article consisted of 35 humorous and paradoxical aphorisms, the last of which was the statement "To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance", which was taken from his as-yet-unpublished play, "An Ideal Husband".

A few months later, Wilde found himself having to defend both his "Phrases and Philosophies" and "The Picture of Dorian Gray" against charges of immorality in the series of criminal trials at the Old Bailey that would prove to be his downfall.

The same issue of "The Chameleon" also saw the publication of "Two Loves", the poem by Lord Alfred Douglas about "the Love that dare not speak its name" that was also famously used against Wilde during his criminal trials.