Quiz Answer Key and Fun Facts
1. A salesman finds me at only two feet into the aisle. His name is Marty. "Looking for a new TV, sir?" he asks. Well, considering that I'm here AND zeroing in on the TV aisle I'd call that a "yes". Marty shows me a very jazzy set first (imagine that?) with a remote that resembles a jumbo jet's control panel! He flips it on to show me the sparkling picture. It's morning and "The Price Is Right" is playing. Yay! One of my guilty pleasures! 'Come on down' and tell me which of these games ISN'T one that appears on that show?
2. "No, thanks," I say to Marty. "Do you have something a mere mortal could use? That thing has more buttons than I have hair follicles. A little too pricey, I might add." He takes me to a smaller set, a VERY smaller one just about the size of a 4-slice toaster. He turns it on and, amidst eyestrain, I see a cartoon playing on a cable channel. Oh, yeah! I loved that old animated (albeit goofy) gem! There's Dr. Benton, Race, Bandit, Jessie and even Hadji! What show is on?
3. "Marty, Marty, Marty," I sigh. "If it was any smaller I'm afraid my vacuum cleaner might inhale it. How about some larger TVs?" He shrugs and leads me to a more sensible looking one, at least at first glance. Yikes, it shows four channels at once? I was confused after 2.4 minutes! One channel was set to old movies and this customer, at least, loves those. It was showing one of my fonder memories. What's not to love about an unseen vixen who's fixing to steal somebody's husband, and, while she's at it, why not tell three women that it might be one of their spouses without revealing which rascal it is!? "A Letter To Three Wives" was a kick, especially since all the husbands could have easily been the cheater. Who played the wives the title refers to in that old masterpiece?
4. I steer Marty away to sets that show only one thing at a time. He's a compliant fellow and leads me to this one with a big cabinet (I guess I never specified much about size). The thing is, in a word, gargantuan! He flips it on and I believe the Lifetime Channel, somewhat life-sized, jumps out at us. It was showing a movie I'd heard about but had never seen, that one with a young Linda Blair in it. Thank goodness it wasn't "The Exorcist" as big vistas of demonic pea soup would not have suited me so early in the day. This was a TV-movie, about a teenager sent to a girls' detention facility. Poor Linda! The most assaulted juvenile actress in modern history, by the looks of things. No crucifixes this time. They came after her with a broomstick! What rather uncomfortable movie was this one?
5. I think Marty's getting impatient with me. Too bad! All I said was that I'd maybe like to buy a television that would fit in the room without moving all the furniture out of it. This next set looks better. Gosh, it has everything on it. VCR, DVD player - the works (couldn't find a garbage disposal, though). It came on just as I was wondering why, if one part of it breaks, the whole shebang has to go in the shop. But I stopped to giggle. On the air was a commercial with two peeved neanderthals snipping at a salesman over dinner. I remember seeing it several times before it made a bit of sense. Now that it DOES make sense it's still pretty silly. What are those neanderthals wanting to buy? Note: it isn't a TV.
6. Marty, the erstwhile salesman, actually agreed with me that one console with 15 different machines could become a maintenence headache, so we moved on to other electronic wizardry. The next set was kind of cute. It was in a cabinet that, if you pushed the right button, would open and the TV would literally spit out of it! When done watching, hit another button and it would slither back in. It reminded me of some oddball turtle! The picture was very nice though. The screen showed that kid from "The Sixth Sense" in one of his early sitcoms, of which he did several. I remembered one little problem Haley Joel Osment has in several of his big AND small screen projects. We have a Mom but where is the Dad? Of the four titles listed which one allowed young Haley both parents at once, together and who had been that way throughout his character's life?
7. "A turtle? Why, I've never heard such a thing" Marty griped. When I then asked him if had one of those contraptions in his den he said 'no' so there was little more to say. Now he was getting to be a wiseacre. The next set looked like something from the 1950s! He thought it might appeal to me, even though it was used and brought in for repairs and never picked up. Very funny. The TV DID work, though, and had a delightful (not!) picture that was more blue and pink than anything else. The woman on the screen was, in any tint, as recognizable as a black bear in a snowstorm without a doubt. It was that caustic and rather dragon-like Judge Judy! Somebody had run into a patio door while riding a skateboard or something and the litigious fur was flying! $450 to repair a door? Go get 'em, Judge Judy. That's a bit steep indeed. She has written a couple of books, I'm told. Which of the following is NOT one of them?
8. Marty had himself a laugh at my expense, the scamp. Never fear, though. The check I'll write him will bounce higher than the lowest cloud. Just kidding - I really DO need a TV. The next model he shows me, once again, looks perfect. He turns it on and there is Archie and Edith Bunker singing away at the piano. One little glitch here: they're singing in Spanish! Marty is wildly trying to program it to be in English with no success. Heck, if he can't figure it out how am I supposed to? As for the Bunkers and "All In The Family" how old was Jean Stapleton when the show debuted and she brought Edith to life?
9. Since I don't speak a word of it, the Spanish-stuck set was out of the question; Marty and I move on to another style just a few steps away. This one seemed reasonable except that it was flat - sort of like a book standing up sideways. I kept looking for the rest of it! Sorry, but I'm used to my TVs looking like boxes, not CD cases. The picture was great and the language was right and the size was perfect. But, ugh, the show that was playing was all wrong. It was one of those morning talk shows and they were talking to the winner of that show "Skating With Celebrities", a certain Kristy Swanson. Her celebrity status in serious question, which of these movies really was a hit for her some 15 years ago in the early 90s?
10. Marty agrees to show me one last set. It'll look normal, act right, and not complicate my world to complete distraction. Wow! He's right. This one is the right size, has a remote control with 20 buttons or less and even isn't scary by design. "It even has wheels," he said, touching the side of it lightly. The thing didn't have wheels - I think it had rockets as it sped off in a westerly direction for 25 feet before it crashed into something and stopped. I can see the headlines now: 'Man Killed At Home When Squashed By A Runaway Television'. As we chased down the speedy little thing it was playing a lovely TV theme song, a ditty by the esteemed Franz Schubert. Which situation comedy featured the song (just the tune) weekly by that composer?
Source: Author
Gatsby722
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linkan before going online.
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