Cat Got Your Tongue? Trivia Quiz

Answer: Je ne parle pas français.

"Je ne parle pas français," you say, apologetically: You don't speak French. You do, however, remember your French pronunciation rules, so what you say sounds something like "Zhihn parl pah frahnsay," where that "ih" sounds like the "i" in the English word "bird."

"Oh!" she says, and repeats herself in English: "Could you take a photo for us, please?" You finally register the camera in her hand. "Of course," you say, taking the camera. The two of them give you big smiles, but you have to crouch down to get all of Notre-Dame de Paris in the frame behind them.

The other phrases also mean "I don't speak this language," but in different languages, of course. Perhaps you'll meet some of them later on ...

Answer: Ya ne ponimaju.

When you tell her "Ya ne ponimaju," pronouncing the consonant "j" like a "y", she smiles and repeats herself in French. "Bon appetit!" she says: Enjoy your food! Borscht is a delicious beet soup, served cold with sour cream, so you're very likely to follow instructions.

"Spasibo" (Thank you) is an excellent response to someone serving you borscht. "Kak vas zovut?" (What is your name?) is a good start to a longer conversation; "Do svidanija" (Goodbye) is a good end to one.

Answer: Mujhe hindi nahi aati hai

The language is Hindi, which is a shared language across most of India. The first word is a pronoun; you're talking about yourself, and your grasp of Hindi (the second word). The third word - "no" - is very widely useful, and the sentence ends with the verb. On learning that you don't speak Hindi, the man repeats his question in English: "Where does this train go?"

The other phrases are also in Hindi. "Namaste," or "Hello," is a great way to start a conversation. After you've been introduced to someone, you might try "Apse milkar bahut khushi hui" (Nice to meet you). And, if you need to consult the schedule in order to answer a question, "Ek minat" (Just a minute) will buy you the time you need.

I should note that Hindi is not written in the Roman alphabet used on this site; instead, it's written in the Devanagari script. The sounds of Hindi don't translate perfectly to the sounds of English or of other western languages, so there are many different ways to transliterate the language into English letters; you may have seen these phrases written differently elsewhere. The same applies to any language that doesn't use the Roman alphabet, from Arabic to Japanese to Russian.

Answer: Hal tatakallam al ingliziya?

"Marhaban" means "Hello" in Arabic, the language of Egypt as well as the rest of North Africa and the Middle East. (Classical Arabic is also the language of the Qur'an, the sacred scripture of Islam.) Someone working in such a well-touristed place is likely to respond affirmatively to your question - in all likelihood, this young man does in fact speak "ingliziya," and you can debate the ticket price in English.

The other choices also mean "Do you speak English?", but in languages that are much less likely to be useful in Egypt. "Praat U Engels?" is in Afrikaans; "Parlez-vous anglais?" is in French; and "¿Habla usted inglés?" is in Spanish.

Answer: Non parlo italiano.

Her language is Italian, or "italiano" in Italian. Here, you're allowed to drop the subject (I) because the conjugation of the verb (parlo) makes it very clear that you're talking about your own knowledge of Italian. Luckily, the woman is able to repeat her question in English - "Excuse me, where are the bathrooms?" - and you're able to help her, having just noticed the sign.

She might have greeted you with "Buon giorno," or "Good day." If she'd asked you how you were, you might have replied that you were doing well, thank you (Bene, grazie). Even without those pleasantries, though, "Arrivederci" is always an acceptable way to say goodbye - though "Ciao" might be easier!

Answer: Wakarimasen.

"Wakarimasen," an extremely useful word, means "I don't understand." (If you do understand, try "Wakarimasu" but remember that the final "-u" sound is often dropped, or almost dropped, in spoken Japanese.) You might follow it up with "Eigo ga hanasemasu ka?" ("Do you speak English?"), again dropping the "-u" sound at the end of "hanasemasu".

As it happens, the gentleman in front of you is very politely asking you to wait a little while. Soon enough, people start moving again, and you're on your way. Narita International Airport is only a little under an hour's train ride from Tokyo, Japan, where you may get a lot more practice saying "Wakarimasen."

Of the other choices, "Domo arigato gozaimas" conveys effusive thanks, while "Ohayo gozaimas" means "Good morning." "Ogenki desu ka?" (drop the "-u" on "desu") is another nice way to start a conversation: it means "How are you?".

Answer: Sprechen Sie Englisch?

As it happens, this train station is in Germany; you can tell they speak German from the signs for tickets (Fahrkarten) and for the ATM (Geldautomat). Meanwhile, "Gleis" refers to a train track, and "Reisezentrum" is a travel center where you can often find help from railway employees. In German, "Sprechen Sie Englisch?" is the polite, formal way to ask someone whether they speak English. "Sprechen" is a tough word for most English speakers to pronounce: that initial "spr" is really more of a "shpr", and the "ch" is a voiceless palatal fricative that sounds sort of like a softer "sh". Many English speakers substitute in a "k" instead, which is at least comprehensible. The word "Sie," a polite form of "you," is pronounced "zee" - but luckily, "English" and "Englisch" sound exactly alike.

"Deutsch" is the German word for German; you're almost certain to get a "Ja" if you ask the woman whether she speaks German, so it's not helpful information. "Parlez-vous anglais?" would be more useful in a French train station, and "Taler du engelsk?" in a Danish one.

Answer: Ni shuo Ying yu ma?

"Yīng yu" is Mandarin Chinese for the English language; "Ni shuo Ying yu ma?" asks, "Do you speak English?" Luckily, this couple does, and they're happy to practice with you. You're very close: just head west a few blocks to Tiananmen Square. The southern wall of the Forbidden City is at the northern edge of the famous square - just look for the giant portrait of Mao Zedong.

"Ni hao ma?" (How are you?) might have been a nice way to begin this conversation, and "Xie xie" (Thank you), pronounced "shyeah shyeah," is a good way to end it. Save "Zhege duoshao qian?" (How much does this cost?) until you get to the ticket counter!

Answer: Sizungumzi Kiswahili.

"Kiswahili" is the Swahili word for the language itself, which has only about five million native speakers but is a standard second language across wide swaths of eastern Africa. The waiter has asked you what you'd like to drink. A good Swahili response might be "Nitakunywa chai" (I'll drink tea). You might recognize the verb "kunywa," to drink, from the original question - the prefix "ni-" signifies that you're talking in the first person, about your own preferences, and "-ta-" signifies that you're talking about the future.

"Jambo," a greeting, is a nice way to start a conversation, and "Nimefurahi kukujua" (I'm pleased to know you) is a fine way to continue it. "Sizungumzi Kijerumani" (I don't speak German) may be true, but in this case it would be rather odd to announce it.

Answer: No entiendo.

This official is asking, in Spanish, "Do you have anything to declare?" Perhaps you do - perhaps you're carrying a large amount of money for a business transaction, or various items that you'd like to sell on your visit. Whether you do or don't, it's best to make it clear to the customs official whether or not you understand her questions. "No entiendo" means "I don't understand"; as is common in Spanish, the pronoun ("yo", or "I") has been dropped since it's indicated by the conjugation of the verb.

"Buenos días," or "Good day," is a greeting. "Un café con leche, por favor" is an order - "Coffee with milk, please." If you bring someone a coffee and they say "gracias" (thank you), then "de nada" (you're welcome) would be a nice response.