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Return of Bad Jokes Trivia Quiz

Back despite popular demand. Ten weak puns that wouldn't make a Cheshire Cat smile, each with a trivia question artfully included.

A multiple-choice quiz by Islingtonian. Estimated time: 4 mins.

Author
Islingtonian

Time
4 mins

Type
Multiple Choice

Quiz #
317,878

Updated
Jul 23 22

# Qns
10

Difficulty
Average

Avg Score
7 / 10

Plays
873

One at a Time - Single Page - Timed Game

Question 1 of 10

1. What do you get if you cross the author of Pericles, Prince of Tyre, with a song by Kelis? Hint

Janice Longfellow

The Fabulous Francis Bacon Boys

William Milkshakespeare

William Goldfingerman

NEXT>

Question 2 of 10

2. I say, I say, I say, did you hear the one about the Fun Loving Criminals' song describing an Iceni queen who goes to the far east? Oh yes, it's called: Hint

Nefertiti Snacks

Cleopatra Belongs to Everyone

Welcome to Hapshetsut's

Korean Boudica

NEXT>

Question 3 of 10

3. Doctor, doctor. I feel like a 1930s hipster.

Oh dear, sounds like you have what? Hint

Chicken Pucks

Menace Elbow

Athlete's Fudd

Hepcatitis

NEXT>

Question 4 of 10

4. What do you get if you cross a popular musical duo from the 1970s with an obscure character from JRR Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings"? Hint

The Captain and Tenille

Sonny and Anthony Sher

Simon and Glorfindel

Bing Crosby and Bob Zherunkel

NEXT>

Question 5 of 10

5. Which signatory to the Declaration of Independence might you find on your roof? Hint

Bitumen Franklyn

Insulation Lincoln

Chimney Cricket

Clark Gable

6. It's 1492, and two Native Americans have shot a deer on a beach. Just as they are about to carry the carcass back home, a boat pulls up, and off steps the capital of Sri Lanka. They talk for a while, and then the capital of Sri Lanka gets back on the boat and sails away.

"Who was that?" asks the first Native American. "Why ..." says the second "it was ___". Hint

Christopher Colombo

John Tegucigalpa

Manila Ice

Amerigo Vespa

NEXT>

Question 7 of 10

7. What sells groceries, and was the first Prime Minster of the UK? Hint

Peter Zellers

Sir Robert Walmart

Margaret Asda

William Pitt the Tescos

NEXT>

Question 8 of 10

8. Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a device for measuring the distance of an object above a given level, such as might be used on a plane.

Oh dear, sounds like you have what? Hint

Water on the Tacyhometer

RMI

Altimeter's disease

Anemometritis

NEXT>

Question 9 of 10

9. Which mustard won the Eurovision Song Contest in 1988? Hint

Brotherhood of Grey Poupon

Sandie Mustard

Katrina and the Plochmans

Celine Dijon

NEXT>

Question 10 of 10

10. I say, I say, I say, did you hear that Bob Dylan is getting so old he now has to use a what? Hint

Walking Stich

Pair of Denches

Colosseum Bag

Zimmerman Frame

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Most Recent Scores

Dec 01 2024 : Guest 97: 9/10
Nov 28 2024 : Kalibre: 5/10

Score Distribution

Quiz Answer Key and Fun Facts

1. What do you get if you cross the author of Pericles, Prince of Tyre, with a song by Kelis?

Answer: William Milkshakespeare

I thought it was appropriate to include one of Shakespeare's comedies, because, like my quizzes, they're not funny.

"Milkshake" was a song by Kelis. It reached number three in the US and number two in the UK, in 2003. I imagine it's a perfectly innocent song about the benefits of delicious ice-cream and milk-based drinks, or something along those lines.

2. I say, I say, I say, did you hear the one about the Fun Loving Criminals' song describing an Iceni queen who goes to the far east? Oh yes, it's called:

Answer: Korean Boudica

Boudica was known previously as Boadicea due to a centuries-old mistranslation. She is feted for leading an uprising against Roman rule in Britain, during the first century AD. She lost badly, but for some reason this tends to be ignored.

British players may be interested to know that Bruce Forsyth's original catchphrase was "Boadicea ... dicea Bo".

3. Doctor, doctor. I feel like a 1930s hipster. Oh dear, sounds like you have what?

Answer: Hepcatitis

The "World of Swing" Newsletter defines a "hepcat" as "a person who is unusually aware of and interested in new and unconventional patterns esp. in music; characterized by a keen informed awareness of or interest in the newest developments." An ironic definition if ever there was one.

4. What do you get if you cross a popular musical duo from the 1970s with an obscure character from JRR Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings"?

Answer: Simon and Glorfindel

In "The Fellowship of the Ring", Glorfindel is sent by Elrond to help Frodo escape from the Nazgul and reach Rivendell. I have literally no idea what I just said.

5. Which signatory to the Declaration of Independence might you find on your roof?

Answer: Bitumen Franklyn

Benjamin Franklin, statesman, inventor and polymath, is of course known worldwide for his development of the glass harmonica. He died in 1790.

By the way, "National Treasure" in which Nicholas Cage discovers an invisible treasure map on the back of the Declaration of Independence, is one of the silliest films of all time. I'm aware this doesn't really qualify as "Interesting Information", but I wanted to get it off my chest.

6. It's 1492, and two Native Americans have shot a deer on a beach. Just as they are about to carry the carcass back home, a boat pulls up, and off steps the capital of Sri Lanka. They talk for a while, and then the capital of Sri Lanka gets back on the boat and sails away. "Who was that?" asks the first Native American. "Why ..." says the second "it was ___".

Answer: Christopher Colombo

Christopher Columbus is often credited as having discovered America, despite the fact that (a) Norse explorers had created a settlement 500 years previously and (b) he thought he was in Asia (and continued in this belief throughout his entire life). The man's a fraud.

PS. In the original version of this question, a short, shabby looking detective would have stepped off the boat, chatted for a while, and then, just as he was about to leave, turned around and said "Just one more thing ...". But that was too lame, even for me.

7. What sells groceries, and was the first Prime Minster of the UK?

Answer: Sir Robert Walmart

Sir Robert Walpole is generally credited as having been the first British Prime Minister. The term "Prime Minister", however, wasn't used until the early 20th century.

8. Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a device for measuring the distance of an object above a given level, such as might be used on a plane. Oh dear, sounds like you have what?

Answer: Altimeter's disease

I know, it's getting pretty poor. But I started this, and I'm going to finish it. I expect you to do the same.

Interesting (nay fascinating) Information - An altimeter measures height. In contrast, a bathymeter measures depth. Oh, yes.

9. Which mustard won the Eurovision Song Contest in 1988?

Answer: Celine Dijon

The word "mustard" comes from the old French terms for "burning" and "must". Make of that what you will.

I once got some mustard in my eye and had to keep my eyes closed for an hour. It was a horrible experience, but I suppose I could have been listening to Celine Dion.

10. I say, I say, I say, did you hear that Bob Dylan is getting so old he now has to use a what?

Answer: Zimmerman Frame

Singer Bob Dylan was born in Minnesota. His real name's Robert Zimmerman. So it's like a "Zimmerman" frame instead of "Zimmer" frame. Do you see? Oh, what's the point?

Source: Author Islingtonian

This quiz was reviewed by FunTrivia editor Pagiedamon before going online.
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