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Joe Miller Reprise Trivia Quiz

Ten more Joe Miller jokes where you are asked to select the correct punch line. These are from the 1864 edition rather than the 1738 edition.

A multiple-choice quiz by Rehaberpro. Estimated time: 5 mins.

Author
Rehaberpro

Time
5 mins

Type
Multiple Choice

Quiz #
321,997

Updated
Jul 23 22

# Qns
10

Difficulty
Average

Avg Score
7 / 10

Plays
328

Question 1 of 10

1. [Alexander] Pope, dining once with Frederic, Prince of Wales, paid the prince many compliments. "I wonder, Pope," said the prince, "that you, who are so severe on kings, should be so complaisant to me". "It is," said the wily bard, "________."

Hint

because kings be too set in their ways

because one must pamper seed for the flower

because I like the lion before his claws are grown

because sometimes the apple falls far from the tree

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Question 2 of 10

2. Lord Chancellor Hardwick's bailiff, having been ordered by his lady to procure a sow of a particular description, came one day into the dining-room when full of company, proclaiming with a burst of joy he could not suppress, "I have been at Royston fair, my lady, __________."

Hint

and I found only a charming piglet

and I found no sow as large as your ladyship's size

and I have got a sow exactly of your ladyship's size

and I found only a Boer to please your ladyship

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Question 3 of 10

3. The government, having threatened to proceed rigorously against those who refused to pay the assessed taxes, offered to them a remission of one fourth. "This at least," said a sufferer, "may be called ___________." Hint

would be fine if I not owed two year taxes

giving them some quarter

since I owe two year may I pay half?

giving a three legged sheep

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Question 4 of 10

4. George III, having purchased a horse, the dealer put into his hands a large sheet of paper, completely written over. "What's this?" said his majesty. "The pedigree of the horse, sire, which you have just bought," was the answer. "Take it back, take it back," said the king, laughing; "___________."

Hint

it will do very well for the next horse you sell

the horse can not read

my footmen carry a shovel

I beware of paper promises

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Question 5 of 10

5. A countryman admiring the stately facade of St. Paul's, asked, whether it was made in England, _____________. Hint

or not from Scotland, I hope

and by what weaver?

or brought from beyond the sea?

or by what artist?

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Question 6 of 10

6. A physician attending a lady several times, had received a couple of guineas each visit; at last, when he was going away, she gave him but one; at which he was surprised, and looking on the floor, "I believe, madam," said he, "I have dropt a guinea." - "No, sir," replied the lady, "_______________."

Hint

better than a shilling

then pick it up your next visit

it is I that have dropt it

with only a cure comes a claim

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Question 7 of 10

7. A chimney-sweeper's boy went into a baker's shop for a two-penny loaf, and conceiving it to be diminutive in size, remarked to the baker that he did not believe it was weight. "Never mind that," said the man of dough, "you will have the less to carry." - "True," replied the lad, and throwing three half-pence on the counter left the shop. The baker called after him that he had not left money enough. "Never mind that," said young sooty, "______________."
Hint

you will have less to count.

but a fair price for a tiny object

true, but they will weigh less

I can't hear you for weight I bear

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Question 8 of 10

8. It was with as much delicacy as satire that Porson returned, with the manuscript of a friend, the answer, "That it would be read when Homer and Virgil were forgotten, _____________."

Hint

and not till doggerel reigns

but not till then

and when all are illiterate

and Latin, Greek, and English are forgotten

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Question 9 of 10

9. Counsellor Crips being on a party at Castle-Martyr, one of the company, a physician, strolled out before dinner into the churchyard. Dinner being served, and the doctor not returned, some one expressed his surprise where he could be gone to. "Oh," says the counsellor, "___________________." Hint

he has gone to pray for his patients

perhaps he has been called for a second opinion

he may be resting in peace

he just stepped out to pay a visit to some of his old patients

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Question 10 of 10

10. When George II was once expressing his admiration of General Wolfe, some one observed that the General was mad. "Oh! He is mad, is he!" said the king, with great quickness, "_______________."

Hint

that madness on our enemies

he would bite some other of my generals

that madness wins many battles

that my generals were as mad

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Quiz Answer Key and Fun Facts

Answer: because I like the lion before his claws are grown

"Joe Miller's Joke Book" often made references to well known people even if that person never said anything like that. Here is a reference to the acid-tongued Alexander Pope, a poet of the 18th century.

Answer: and I have got a sow exactly of your ladyship's size

The Earl of Hardwicke was a lawyer and political advisor to prime ministers during the 18th century.

Answer: giving them some quarter

Attitudes toward taxes have always been a prime complaint of the public. Perhaps these quotes can sum up this attitude:

"The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward." (John Maynard Keyes)

"Taxes are important. President Bush's tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they were one of." (Andy Rooney)

"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax." (Albert Einstein)

Answer: it will do very well for the next horse you sell

George III was the hated enemy of the American colonies during the American Revolutionary War. He often suffered from mental illness as depicted in the film "The Madness of King George" (1994) which featured Nigel Hawthorne as George and Helen Mirren as Queen Charlotte.

5. A countryman admiring the stately facade of St. Paul's, asked, whether it was made in England, _____________.

Answer: or brought from beyond the sea?

The original St. Paul's was built in 604 AD. When it was destroyed by the Great Fire of London, the fame architect Christopher Wren designed the present structure on the same site in 1675 although it took until 1711 to complete. First services were held in 1697.

Answer: it is I that have dropt it

The pre-decimalisation British system of coinage was introduced by King Henry II. It was based on the troy system of weighing precious metals. The penny was literally one pennyweight of silver. A pound sterling thus weighed 240 pennyweights, or a pound of sterling silver.

Answer: you will have less to count.

I think this reminds us all of paying for a pound of coffee and find it contains only 11.5 ounces.

8. It was with as much delicacy as satire that Porson returned, with the manuscript of a friend, the answer, "That it would be read when Homer and Virgil were forgotten, _____________."

Answer: but not till then

Richard Porson was an 18th century scholar and writer. Much of his work dealt with meter in poetry which is contained in "Polson's Law".

Answer: he just stepped out to pay a visit to some of his old patients

Castlemartyr is a village near Cork in Ireland. It is of historical interest as its many artifact reflect a long span of history.

10. When George II was once expressing his admiration of General Wolfe, some one observed that the General was mad. "Oh! He is mad, is he!" said the king, with great quickness, "_______________."

Answer: he would bite some other of my generals

George II term as king were marked by disputes with both his father and his son. He is considered a weak king in that he had little interest in politics, diplomacy, or warfare. This lead to Parliament becoming a more powerful political force.

Source: Author Rehaberpro

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