Interview with a Goldfish Trivia Quiz

Answer: Yes

Copper adds: "Oh, please feed us vegetables, we like vegetables. They're good for our little digestions, y'know. We just can't eat as much protein as most fish, and we have problems with our tummies if we don't eat our greens".

Answer: China

Todd looks at you gravely, then comments "A lot of people don't know we're Chinese. We are carp with a genetic 'error' that causes us to be such a striking colour. We were kept as living decorations in the Tang and Song dynasties, and gradually exported first to Japan, then Europe. I and my friend are very cosmopolitan, and we hope that anyone applying for this position will respect that."

Answer: Rover

Todd replies: "The Lionhead has a large head, the Veil Tail has very long fins and a broad tail, while Celestial Eyes never look where they are going, because their eyes are raised to the heavens. A Rover is the make of car driven by our owner".

Answer: No

Swimming backwards and forwards excitedly, Copper says: "That three-second memory thing is just a lie, probably spread by those nasty tropical aquarium fish. We're really, really good at recognising people, and we get really, really excited when we see the face of the person who feeds us, and swim around really, really fast, because we're so excited that we're going to be fed. I really, really like food."

Answer: Nothing - goldfish can't do any damage

Copper notes: "I'm just a baby, but even full-sized goldfish can't maul a human. Please don't have me put down, and I promise not to give you rabies or anything. You don't need to rest and drink, although teadrinker, our owner, appears to do nothing except lie on the sofa and drink tea.

She also watches TV, which we enjoy, because goldfish just love to see things going on around them, and we hope our sitter won't mind if we come to the front of our bowl to watch TV with them.

Answer: Friendly

Todd intones: "We goldfish like to socialise with each other, and to take an interest in our surroundings, so please make our surroundings interesting with plants and gravel so we have something to occupy our time. We don't tend to attack other creatures, although we aren't very good at sharing our food with other fish. Sometimes humans think we are sickly creatures, but we can live for twenty years if we are well looked after."

Answer: A goldfish walker

"We don't read the newspapers ourselves, of course," Copper points out, "but word does get around you know." He wanted to take his goldfish, Ethel and Mildred, for a walk in the park, so he made a spill-proof trolley for their bowl. They even get to go to the pub!

Answer: Yes

"'Auratus' means gold. We are a small carp, closely related to the crucian carp, hence the 'carassius' bit of our name", instructs the surprisingly well-read fish.

Answer: Fin rot

Copper wheezes painfully: "The vet says it's fin rot, probably caused by poor water quality. I have to take anti-biotics, and I could pass over to the big bowl in the sky. Ich and white spot are both scale infections, and swimbladder disease causes balance problems."

Answer: Goldfish don't have eyelids, so they can't close their eyes, meaning they always appear awake

The goldfish reply together: "Tragically, fish have no eyelids, so we cannot get a good bit of shut-eye at night. No humans are sure whether we sleep with our eyes open, or whether we just rest a bit when it gets dark. But whatever the truth is, we do need to be in a darkish room at night because otherwise we cannot get enough rest, since we are unable to shut out the light. Unless it is dark we will stay up partying twenty-four seven, which will weaken our immune systems, and we might get ill. So please dim the light switch and bid us goodnight." We'll let you know about the job when you hit "Submit Quiz".