"Someone Old, Someplace New" Trivia Quiz

Answer: Will, Bill, Phil

Will comes home from his date and there is Grace with her date. Grace walks over to Will and says, "Will. Hi. What are you doing here?" Will says, "On a date." Grace says, "Well, I'm on a date, too." She then introduces them to each other, "Will, Bill. Bill, Will." Will says, "Hey, Bill. Will." He then introduces his date to Grace's date, "Bill, Phil. Phil, Bill." Phil shakes Bill's hand, "Bill." Bill in turn shakes Phil's hand, "Phil." Will then says, "And this is Grace." Grace says, "It's a thrill." Will says, "Good save."

Answer: The Perfect Storm

Since they both have dates, they want each other to leave but they each refuse. Grace says, "Okay. Why don't you guys just go into the bedroom?" Will says, "We're not ready to go in the bedroom yet. Why don't you go in the bedroom?" Grace says, "We've already been in the bedroom." Will says, "Why does this keep happening? We're constantly on top of each other. We have no privacy. Last night, I heard noises from your bedroom that sounded like a pig being tickled." Grace says, "So, I snore a little. Well, you're a loud pee-er. I swear, it sounds like the last hour of "The Perfect Storm" in there."

Answer: her new liver

Jack walks into Grace Adler Designs and says, "Karen. Strap yourself in, because I have gotten you what I believe to be pants-down, the best birthday gift you're gonna get all year." Karen says, "Oh! Honey, is my new liver in?" Jack says, "No. I'm making a film that celebrates your life. It's called, "Karen: A Celebration of Life". A film, breathtaking in its scope and ambition."

Answer: $280

Rosario is filming Jack as he makes his video for Karen and says, "We're here with the sad couple. If you're just joining us, we're digging into the mystery of Karen Walker. We're going through her checkbook, in an attempt to find out who she is. He then turns to Grace and says, "Now, Grace, right this way. Thank you for coming. On the eighteenth, Karen wrote you a check for $280. What does that mean to you?" Grace says, "She paid me $10 a day not to wear ruffles or eat Ruffles in the office." Jack responds, "Interesting, interesting. Yet not so." He then pushes Grace aside and pulls Will inf front of the camera and says, "Okay, right this way. Thank you, Will. Thank you. Okay. And here, Karen wrote you a check a mere two days later for expense reimbursement. I'm pretty sure only one of those is a word.

But what could that mean to you?" Will says, "It was a guilt payment for throwing her credit card at my face." Jack says, "Just as I thought. This checkbook is unlocking the mystery of Karen Walker." Rosario then says, "And I thought shooting those pornos for Tommy Lee was a tough gig."

Answer: Lois Whitley

Karen asked Jack who else he's interviewed and he tells her, "All your closest friends, Pharmacist, Butler, Jeweler, Backup Pharmacist." Karen says, "I hope Pharmy and Backup Pharmy don't find out about each other. That's a catfight waitin' to happen." Jack says, "But you know, Karen, I'd love to include your mother in my "Project Queen-light." What institution is she in?" Karen says, "Oh. I was just kidding when I told you she was in the loony bin. Funny story, actually.

She's dead." Jack says, "What's funny about that?" Karen says, "Well, she was alive, and now she's dead. Get it?" Jack then asks, "Who's Lois Whitley?" Karen backs up against the wall and says, "Huh? What? Who?" Jack says, "Well, I've been working my way through your checkbook, trying to figure out who you are by how you spend. Who is she?" Nervously Karen says, "Oh. Well, honey, I think that's somebody driver ran over." Jack says, "But usually, when Driver runs somebody over, there's a little frowny face in the memo part of the check." Karen says, "Yeah, well maybe it was one of those double-pedestrian dealios. Who cares? Listen, I gotta go see a man about a horse pill!" She then runs out and Jack looks into the camera and says, "Lois Whitley. I don't think we've heard the last of her. Come with us now as we begin to unravel the mystery of Karen Walker."

Answer: tabasco

Jack and Rosario are searching for Karen's mother and Jack says, "Are you sure this is the right address?" Rosario says, "The landlord said Lois Whitley works at Paddy's Pub. This place is Paddy's Pub." Jack wipes his eye and says, "Okay. It's not the fact you spit that bothers me.

It's the fact you spit Tabasco. This obviously isn't the place. Look, just grab the gear, and we'll do the interview with Karen's hairdresser, and we'll get that in the can." Rosario says, "Take it easy, Martin Scorsissy. I schlepped this equipment all over Yonkers. I want to sit down and toss back a few."

Answer: since 1947

Jack yells out to the waitress, "Excuse me, miss. Yeah, we're ready to order over here. What's good?" The waitress says, "What's good? Me in Hawaii with Richard Crenna. What do we got here? You look like a bus and truck company of "West Side Story." Jack says, "You know, I played Maria a time or two.

It's true, I tell ya. Anyway, I'll have a club soda with two teaspoons of sugar, a splash of Rosa's Lime Juice, half crushed ice, half cubed, and an umbrella." The waitress says, "One beer." Jack slams his hand on the table and says, "Excuse me! Rudeness! I would like the drink I ordered! And maybe even a "Hello, my name is pbblt. I'll be your server tonight." The waitress says, "Listen, Maria, I've been on this shift since, what time is it now? 1947. My back aches, my feet hurt, and the only thing holding up my boobs is hope. So, you'll enjoy your beer." Jack says, "A beer would be great. Thanks." Rosario says, "Make that two, and a couple of hard-boiled eggs." The waitress then says, "By the way, my name is Lois. I'll be your server tonight." Jack says, "Lois? Lois Whitley? We came here to film you." Lois says, "Film me? Oh, honey, I haven't done those kind of movies in 30 years. Just give me a few minutes to freshen up." Jack says, "Oh, no.

It's not that at all. I'm doing a film tribute to a friend of mine, and I come here today with my crew to ask you a few questions about said friend." He then motions for Rosario to begin filming and says, "So, Lois Whitley, tell us. What exactly is your relationship to one Ms. Karen Walker?" Lois says, "I'm her mother." Rosario says, "Santa Maria, it has a mother?"

Answer: cute little attitude

Jack tells Will and Grace, "I met Karen's mother. She's not dead. She's a cocktail waitress. It turns out Karen's father died when she was seven. Oh my God. Can you imagine what Karen looked like when she was seven years old? Cute little pumps, cute little martini, cute little pills."

Answer: False

All four of them are watching Karen's tape and we hear Will's voice, "So, Karen, on this, the centennial of your birth, Jack wants me to wish you a happy birthday. I hope all your wishes come true, and when you do become Satan's mistress, don't you forget the little people."

Answer: Kiki

Jack says, "Okay, Karen. When you look back on your life, what is the one thing that has gotten away from you? Who is that one person that could make your life complete again?" Karen says, "Sunny's out of bed? Finally! Von Bulow, get in here!" Jack says, "No, not Sunny V.B., silly. Your mother!" He then tells Rosario to start filming. Just then Lois walks in and says, "Hiya, Kiki!" Jack is happy and says, "Yay! Happy birthday! Finally, the mystery is solved!" Karen says to Lois, "I told you I never wanted to see you again!" Karen then runs out of the apartment.