"Miami Twice" - Pt 2 Quiz 2

Answer: True

That night at the mansion, Rodney is worried. Del has been gone all day, it's bucketing down outside and no one's heard from him. Rico tells him not to worry and whispers to the others that tomorrow they'll put the second limey "out of his misery". They all have a chuckle, then the doorbell rings. Rico is not surprised it's one of the police surveillance team, who naturally think his father was lost at sea. "Any news of my father?" Rico pretends to be worried. "Yes, sir, and I'm afraid it's bad news." Rico pretends to sob as the officer relates how they "fished him out" hours ago. "He's dead!" the prodigal son sobs. "Nope - he's alive and well." Rico looks up, now in genuine horror! That's the bad news; the police incorrectly assumed Don Occhetti was trying to reach a getaway boat, but ran out of gas.

Then Rico sees another officer escorting a certain sun-burnt Englishman up to the door! Del sighs, "I don't know what I would've done if that police 'elicopter 'adn't found me." Once Del is out of earshot the officer mentions Don Occhetti sounds Australian for some reason - possibly salt on the vocal chords.

But Rico snarls, "Oh rest assured officer, I've got something for his throat!"

Answer: True

At first Raquel is annoyed the father of her child hasn't phoned as promised, but not worried... until four or five days pass and they hear nothing, except for Albert who gets a phone call saying his great-nephews' camper-van has been found broken-into and abandoned outside a Miami night-club. Later on at the Nags Head, all of Raquel's friends (and Cassandra's father, Alan) are trying to cheer her up.

But Mickey Pearce makes matters worse by mentioning his brother once went missing on holiday but turned up safe and sound - he'd been cheating on his wife. "Shut up.

There's a good boy," says Alan. Mike and Sid are watching the telly and suddenly Mike calls out, "Hey Raquel!" Everyone looks up and sees two familiar faces on the screen, surrounded by sinister men in black suits. Trigger exclaims, "There's Del and Dave!" The poor Londoners cannot understand.

This is a documentary about a gangster boss the Miami District Attorney's Office has nicknamed "Public Enemy Number One". With Sicilian music in the background, the American voice adds Del's "web of vice and corruption has spread throughout the western hemisphere, and he is now considered the most dangerous man since Al Capone." There is a stunned silence in the Nags Head. "'Public enemy Number One'"? exclaims a flabbergasted Raquel. "But he only left Tuesday!"

Answer: Colombian

After the prolonged joy-ride at sea, poor Del is stuck indoors for a few days, so the gangsters don't have another chance to "whack" him in public. But on the day before the brothers are due to fly home, the goons get them to play tennis round the back. Why? The real Don Occhetti is expecting visitors any minute. Two Colombian cocaine merchants, who don't know the Don is facing trial and/or about to close their account. Rico and all the other thugs are waiting out the front, a show of strength. But the Trotters in their blissful ignorance are playing tennis, until Rodney gets fed up losing and storms inside. Rico and the others don't seem to be around, so Rodney is finally able to use a telephone (needless to say they hadn't really been knocked out during a storm). Cassandra is enormously relieved to hear from him; she's been worried sick like Raquel and co.

It looks like their marriage might be going to be saved after all. Rodney says it's a pity Cassandra couldn't come; the people here are so nice (little does he know!).

But his good mood changes when Cassandra reveals she'd told Del at the beginning she wouldn't be free that week. But it was Del who booked the tickets for this week, so he must have planned this whole thing. "To get a free holiday!" Rodney exclaims. He may have saved his marriage, but who is going to save Del?

Answer: False

Miami's Godfather is working out in his office's private gym, looking forward to meeting the two Colombians and telling them to go and find another distributor. He phones the downstairs extension just as Delboy's walking past and picks it up. "Hello? Battersea Dogs Home" and then Del barks and woofs and howls.

A perplexed mafia boss hangs up and Del cracks up laughing, enjoying himself on his holiday. Both men are unaware they've just been speaking to a double. Don Occhetti has been grumbling all day about having "limeys" in his home. Shortly afterwards, he has to shrink down into his large armchair to hide when Delboy's exploring the mansion and finds the Don's office.

Answer: Mistakes him for Del

There are disadvantages to having a brother who resembles the local crime-lord - particularly when staying in his home! An irate Rodney storms upstairs, sees a man who looks like his brother and grabs him by the throat. Rodney snarls, "You git! You rotten conniving git!" Don Occhetti realises he's been mistaken for the other "limey" and can only nod as Rodney confronts him about someone called "Cassandra". Rodney explodes with rage, abuses the Don, repeatedly bangs his head against the wall (arguably deserved) and shouts, "And where did you get that stupid tracksuit from?!...No, don't you talk to me! Just - do - not - talk - to - me!" and storms off to their guest-suite.

He angrily slams the door behind him and locks it, and in his blind fury he doesn't wonder why Del is already in there - wearing different clothes.

Answer: To avoid the Church of England

At first Delboy's pre-blessed wine scheme is a huge success. As the reverend tells Raquel, the various churches in London appreciate Del selling it so cheaply, too. But there is a tiny problem - the wine is white, and it's supposed to be red. ("Oh God!" exclaims Raquel.

The reverend agrees, "That's what I keep saying.") In Miami Del tries to calm the furious Rodney down when he confronts him about what Cassandra said. "I was frightened of being cursed," Del explains. He just wanted to lie low for a while. But, oddly enough, this doesn't satisfy Rodney. "I swear to you, Del! You are the most selfish, the most...! How did you get in here?" Rodney locked the door behind him, but Del's somehow got inside. And he's not wearing that crazy tracksuit any longer either. Del answers, "Well I came through that door.

It's a blindin' invention, Rodders!" Slowly, it dawns on Rodney that he must have been yelling at someone on the landing who looks like Del. "A double?" Del ponders aloud, "You know what this means don't you Rodney?" Rodney doesn't know. "It means... you're an even bigger plonker than I thought you were!" Rodney insists, Delboy should come see for himself. "Alright, I will if it'll shut you up!"

Answer: George H.W. Bush

Rodney takes his brother back to where he met the strange man. But the roughed-up Don Occhetti has returned to his office gym and resumed exer-cycling with his head-phones on. (He keeps muttering, "I hate limeys. I hate 'em! I hate 'em!") Rodney keeps watch while Delboy goes in to check out the office. Del was in that office earlier, but did not look round carefully.

This time he spins an enormous globe around and runs out when it clatters loudly (no wonder, it's the Don's liquor cabinet!), but then he stops, turns back and spots a full-length portrait above the desk.

It's him! Wearing the same clothes and chains Rico lent him for the restaurant! Del hates to admit it, but that little plonker Rodney is right. He looks around and sees all these photos of his look-a-like with a bunch of celebrities, including the Pope and Dame Edna.

But what interests him most is a newspaper with a photo of his doppelganger on the front page. Del reads all about this "Don Occhetti" character, his Family, his business, his history, his trial tomorrow, and then he recalls all the "accidents" he's had in Miami.

They weren't accidents at all. "They're trying to kill me," he whispers softly. "Fromage frais!" He's so astonished he doesn't hear footsteps slowly approaching...

Answer: Rico

Rico is bringing the two Colombian drug barons up the stairs to his father's office. Rodney hisses, "Del, 'urry up! Somebody's comin'", but Del is so engrossed in the newspaper article he doesn't hear him. Rodney runs off and Rico brings two strange men in and addresses Del as "Pop".

At first Del panics. Then he inwardly sighs with relief; the two-faced Rico has obviously mistaken him for this "Don Occhetti" character. It's not easy, but Del manages to impersonate a mafia boss over the next few minutes.

The two men eagerly kiss his hand, sit down, treat him like royalty and discuss their shipment of merchandise.

Answer: Cocaine

When Del learns the merchandise is cocaine, he turns pale, but quickly regains his composure and tells them when and where to deliver it that night. He promises someone will be there to meet them, but naturally they don't know he means the cops (I love the irony of Del Trotter informing the authorities).

Then the real Don turns on the shower in the next room, and Del, thinking quickly, claims that it's his girlfriend. But then they hear a loud "Burp!" (which Del quickly claims is his "senorita's" indigestion!) The two drug lords are looking at him strangely, but thankfully they believe him.

Answer: Climb out the window

Once the two Colombians have left, Del sprints back to the guestroom. Rodney is there already and wonders why his big brother is hiding his face. A panic-stricken Del tells Rodney everything. Rodney does not believe him, until Del shows him the Colombians' cocaine contract. So Rodney's Del-look-a-like was a mafia boss! Rodney exclaims, "I just called him a 'git'! I have just called a mafia boss a 'git'!" Del adds, "These are not the sort of people you wanna spend your 'olidays with!", adding that Rico can forget about the thank you present they were going to buy him.

They have to leave immediately - preferably out the window.

Answer: The horse's head on a pillow scene

Throughout "Miami Twice" there have been a lot of allusions to Francis Ford Coppola's timeless classic "The Godfather", including not just Damien's baptism, the music and the Occhetti Family's background, but David Jason's impeccable impersonation of Marlon Brando.

The last allusion is when the Trotters are about to climb out the window. Rodney cries, "Quick, before I wake up with a 'orse'ss 'ead on me pillow!"

Answer: An alligator

The two brothers take refuge in the swamplands to avoid the pursuing mafia. Rodney is excited because he's been reading about these Everglades in his Greenpeace magazines. But Del is far from happy, especially when he falls into a hole whilst running.

The two brothers sit on a log and rest awhile, arguing. Then Rodney notices another log behind them, which has a tail and sharp teeth. "Delboy..." he whispers. "Oh shut up, Rodney, you're beginning to get on my nerves!" Rodney hisses that he wants Del to (very slowly) stand up and walk away. Del exclaims ,"What is this? 'Simple Simon Says'?" Then he spots the reptile and understands... and the two comedians run for their lives. Del exclaims, "That was a crocodile!" But Rodney explains it's actually an alligator. "It's the same thing, innit?" Del wants to know who let it out of the zoo. Rodney, again patiently, explains they actually live here. "'They'?!" exclaims Del. "You mean there's more than one of them?" Rodney sighs, "Don't panic, they're usually a nocturnal animal so it's very rare to see one in the daylight," but this does not cheer his brother up at all. Del sighs and confesses he wishes he had never come with Rodney to Miami. Rodney angrily reminds him, "I did not invite you, Derek, you invited yourself!" (I think we'll all agree that's fair comment...)

Answer: Moaning

When Boycie and Marlene and their little boy, Tyler, embark on their American holiday, they have no idea Del and Rodney will follow. When their plane is flying to from Washington DC to Miami, they spot a man on a rigged mafia jet-ski. "We're 25 miles off the coast!" exclaims Boycie, not knowing it's Del. Prior to that he was moaning about DC's beaches. Several days later the Boyces are on a boat going through the swamplands, no idea Rodney and Del are hiding in that very swamp.

Then suddenly, as Boycie takes photos, he takes one of Del in a tennis outfit.

The astonished Boyces let the Trotters onto their boat and set off. Good timing! The mafiosi arrive at the riverbed, spot the two "limeys" on the boat and shoot after them. Park rangers hurry to investigate. Boycie exclaims, "We were having a lovely time.

Then we meet these two. And then some sod's shooting at us!" Marlene exclaims, "Oh, stop your moaning!"

Answer: False

The terrified Londoners all make it safely to the wooden jetty. All the park rangers have actually left to investigate the gunfire, so no one bothers them. An exhausted Del puts the Colombians' document about the midnight cocaine delivery on the park rangers' door.

The next day, there are three major stories in Miami News: 1) The Colombians were caught and arrested with their cocaine; 2) Don Occhetti will be going to jail for life, and 3) His son Ricardo "Rico" was arrested in the Everglades for illegal hunting.

The lovely reporter also adds, "Police are now looking for two Australians in connection with the latter," but Rodney and Del are now fast asleep flying back to London.

Answer: Hundreds of cases of wine

When the exhausted brothers walk into the flat and they are surrounded by numerous boxes of wine bottles! Raquel, Albert and the Reverend are waiting and raise their wine glasses in salute. "Welcome 'ome, boys!" says Albert cheerfully. Rodney and Del look at one other, sadly. This was certainly a holiday they'll always remember!