"Cash and Curry" Trivia Quiz

Answer: He is entertaining a "friend" when Del phones

Del has a new friend, an Indian businessman named Vimmal Malik. He's trying to impress Vimmal. So one night he phones Rodney and gets him to pick them up at a casino. When the irate Rodney arrives, Del points out, "It's more impressive if you get your driver to come round and pick you up." Rodney grumbles irritably, "When you phoned I was in the flat, with a friend." Del asks, "Well why didn't you bring him with you?" Rodney snarls, "It was not a 'he'." (Del's been drinking, so he doesn't get it straight away.)

Answer: Origami

As the two Trotter brothers lead Vimmal into the dark carpark, two Indians suddenly get out of a car. A small bearded gentleman with glasses, and his large bodyguard. Vimmal recognises the small man straight away and seems on the verge of hitting him.

Hello, what has Del stumbled onto? The little man who later introduces himself as "Mr. Ram" assures Del, "I have no quarrel with you, my friend." But Del loyally steps forward to protect his friend Vimmal. Mr. Ram warns him, "My colleague here is a 2nd-Dan in karate." But Del just blows cigar-smoke and retorts coolly "And I'm a black belt - in origami." (Rodney shakes his head sadly; declining to point out origami is in fact the Japanese art of paper folding.) A fight is brewing...but then Del shouts "Police!" and, when all heads are turned, punches the Indian thug in the groin. "Rodney, you and Vimmal, in the car. Quick!" Rodney obeys... and foolishly drives off without Del. Del gulps, but then the mysterious Mr. Ram offers to buy him a meal. Having little choice, Del agrees.

These strange people don't seem to mean him any harm. But what is all this about?

Answer: Del forgets to name the restaurant in his message

Del is eating with Mr. Ram and his henchman. He's also impatiently waiting for Rodney to show up. Mr. Ram explains he owns this restaurant, plus 17 others. Rodney finally comes in, running breathlessly. Del grumbles, "It's taken you an hour and a half to get here! Didn't Grandad tell you I'd telephoned?" Rodney points out the message lacked something important: the name and location of the restaurant. So all Grandad knew was "Delboy's been captured by the Indians." Rodney adds irritably, "I didn't know whether to phone the police or the Texas rangers!" But the two brothers sit with Mr. Ram and listen to his story.

He tells Rodney, "I was just telling your brother how well I've done since I came to Britain." He adds, "I also own a lot of land. If I got into my car at 9 o'clock in the morning - it would take me up till 2 in the afternoon to drive around my land." Rodney jokes, "Yeah we had a car like that once!" (Mr. Ram doesn't get the joke.)

Answer: "Oddjob"

As Mr. Ram discusses his land, Del says, "Oddjob 'ere has got a couple of ache-ers, too!" (Luckily the over-muscled henchman obeys Mr. Ram and doesn't thump him.) Mr. Ram finally gets to the point. He has been pursuing his rival Vimmal, because he wants to buy a certain small statuette from him.

A statue of Kubera, a Hindu God of wealth. Long ago it was taken from his family by Vimmal's ancestors. Now Mr. Ram is frustrated. He grumbles, "I'm a rich man, Mr. Trotter. I shouldn't have to stoop to the kind of intimidation you witnessed tonight!" He's so keen to retrieve this family artifact he's prepared to pay 4,000 pounds - only Vimmal won't speak to him so it's impossible. Plus there's another difficulty: the two rivals belong to different castes, thus aren't allowed to communicate.

Then Del has a brainwave. Why doesn't he act as a go-between?

Answer: Del realises Vimmal isn't very rich after all

Vimmal cannot believe his ears. The Trotter brothers visit him in his flat the next day and recount their meeting with Mr. Ram. "I thought you were my friend, Derek!" he exclaims. "I AM Vimmal, me ol' mucker," Del assures him. He still isn't quite sure what reward he will ask from Ram once the statue is sold.

Then he decides to be honest... almost. He says Mr. Ram desperately wants to buy the statue, but convienantly forgets the price was 4000 pounds and says Ram offered 2000 pounds. Del quickly prevents Rodney from correcting him.

He also points out for a god of wealth, the statue doesn't seem to have done Vimmal any favours. He lives in a rather tiny apartment, after all. Perhaps that statue is cursed? Vimmal finally sighs and says "I am not a superstitious man, Derek.

But I am a businessman and a realist. I have decided to accept his offer." He disappears to get the statue.

Answer: False

In fact our hero does exactly the opposite. When Vimmal shows Del the statue Ram wants so desperately, Del comments, "I'm a Ming fan meself, you know. He made some wonderful stuff didn't he, that Ming?" Rodney rolls his eyeballs up. Vimmal says tactfully "'Ming' was a dynasty, Derek." Del shakes his head, "I don't care what he was, Vimmal, he made a smashing vase!" Then Vimmal adds he doesn't trust Ram so he won't part with the statue until he gets the money. Del and Rodney curse. Ram said the same thing. So the two brothers decide to liquidate their jewellery, furniture, and even Granddad's telly (which is actually a rental!) and finally they come up with 2,000. Del chuckles "Vimmal can't tell the difference! He won't know this isn't Ram's money.

He'll think he's won the battle." But Rodney is not happy. Not just about the trickery, but the fact they've virtually bankrupted themselves. Still, they are about to get double their money back. Aren't they?

Answer: True

Rodney waits nervously in the van as his brother concludes the crucial deal inside Vimmal's flat. Then Del emerges, waving the statue in triumph...and trips over. Help! Rodney stares horror as the statue tumbles, and Del rolls over on his back... and catches the statue just in time! Phew!

Answer: Mr. Ram has disappeared

Smiling and feeling extremely chuffed, the brothers enter the same restaurant where they met Mr. Ram. There is no sign of the bespectacled gentleman at present, and they tell the waiter they want to see the owner. He keeps repeating everything they say and they assume his English is not very good.

Then he claims he owns the restaurant. Finally Del sighs "We want to see the REAL OWNER." The waiter sighs, too. "I AM the 'REAL OWNER'! You drunks always come in here causing trouble." With gritted teeth, Del and Rodney slowly describe Mr. Ram and "Oddjob". Finally the waiter smiles "Oh, ~that~ Mr. Ram! I know who you're talking about now." The two brothers sigh with relief... until the owner reveals Mr. Ram was a customer whose cheque bounced. Del turns pale. "No no, there must be some mistake.

He told me owned this restaurant...he told me he owned 18 of 'em!" Trying to be helpful, the genuine owner suggests, "Maybe he was... fibbing?"

Answer: True

"'Fibbing'?!" exclaims Del, motioning the statue. "I have just paid 2000 pounds for this on the strength of him 'fibbing'!" The manager actually recognises the statue in Del's hand. "2000 pounds?" he exclaims "But why?" he points to the back of his restaurant - to a bunch of identical statues! The Trotters' jaws drop.

The owner reveals he only paid 17.50 for each, adding, "It's amazing how much you can save if you shop around."

Answer: Con-man

The two Indian "rivals" and "Oddjob" are driving out of London. Vimmal and Ram are in hysterics, and comparing notes about Delboy Trotter. Vimmal says, "He tried to tell me the statue was cursed!" and Ram says Del thought Kubera was actually a wicket keeper! It transpires that these three men have been driving all over England tricking people. Or as they put it: conning those who think they can exploit the religious bigotry of two "stupid" immigrants.

In the meantime Rodney and Del return to Vimmal's flat, and learn he too has left town. Rodney tries to cheer Del up by mentioning there's a curry house down the road, but Del still has the useless statue in his hand. Rodney ducks just in time...