Don't Sing Me That! Volume II Trivia Quiz

Answer: Rolf Harris

"Two Little Boys" was written by Theodore F. Morse/Edward Madden in or around 1903. It was number one for six weeks for Rolf Harris in 1969. It did not chart in the US.

The song is about two childhood friends who go to war, although which war has been open to speculation ever since. It is rumoured that John Lennon sent Rolf Harris a telegram congratulating him on getting an anti-Vietnam war song to number one at Christmas 1969. As it was written in 1903 by two Americans, it may well be about the American civil war.

Besides thinking the song was just as Rolf Harris said on first hearing the song ("namby-pamby and awful"), I dislike it even more because of its connection with Margaret Thatcher; she picked it as her favourite song on BBC Radio Blackburn in 1979. That killed it stone dead.

Question submitted by shipyardbernie.

Answer: Klaus Meine

"Wind Of Change" was on the band's eleventh studio album, "Crazy World" (1990). The single was a massive hit, hitting number one in Austria, France, Germany, the Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, and Switzerland. It managed number two on the UK singles chart, and number four on the US Billboard chart.

I'm a huge Scorpions fan and get so annoyed that they are known to most folk for this dewy-eyed tosh. I know it caught the overwhelming optimism and zeitgeist of the post-Glasnost Eastern Bloc, but I don't really think the pop music medium is a suitable place to celebrate/criticize international politics. Furthermore, I'm a cynical git.

Although Meine isn't a founder member of the Scorpions, he appeared on their first ever album, "Lonesome Crow" (1972), and has written many of the band's lyrics, such as "Steamrock Fever", "He's A Woman - She's A Man", "In Trance", and "Rock You Like A Hurricane"; topics he's much more adept to deal with.

About the red herrings; Herman "the German" Rarebell was Scorpions drummer from 1977 to 1995, George Grosz was a German artist best known for his scornful caricatures, and Helmut Kohl was Chancellor of Germany from 1982 to 1998.

Question submitted by thula2.

Answer: Daydream Believer

"Daydream Believer" was a number one hit for The Monkees and was included on their 1968 album "The Birds, The Bees & The Monkees". The single rose to number one on the Billboard Hot 100 and the Irish singles chart, number two in Norway, number four in Germany and Japan, number five on the UK singles chart, and number seven in Australia. When the song was re-released after a successful reunion of The Monkees in 1986, it was only a minor hit.

Canadian singer Anne Murray released this song as a single in 1980 and it rose to number one on the US Billboard Adult Contemporary chart, number one the Canadian RPM Country Tracks and the Canadian RPM Adult Contemporary chart. It made number three on the Billboard Hot Country singles chart and number 12 on the Billboard Hot 100.

The song was written by John Stewart, who was a member of the Kingston Trio at that time. He recorded his own version in 1971 for his album "The Lonesome Picker Rides Again". It has also been recorded by Alvin and the Chipmunks, and Susan Boyle.

Question submitted by wenray.

Answer: Stevie Wonder

Multi-talented Mr Wonder did vocals, electric piano, synthesisers, drums, percussion, and backing vocals on the song. Macca got full writing credits, which seems unfair since that part can't have been a massive effort, whereas Stevie must have at least broken into a sweat.

"Ebony and Ivory" was a massive hit, especially in the U.S.A. where it spent seven weeks as number one on the Billboard Hot 100.

To my ears it's the corniest message song of all time, and in more sceptical times might easily be taken for a spoof.

Question submitted by thula2.

Answer: Bob Dylan

"Mr. Tambourine Man" was written by Bob Dylan and was number one for one week on the Billboard Hot 100 for The Byrds in 1965. It was number one for two weeks on the UK singles chart the same year.

It was a hard choice between Shatner's versions of "Mr. Tambourine Man", "Rocket Man" and "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds". I made the sacrifice for my team and players of this quiz and listened to all three again, just to make sure. Be warned, William Shatner is not the only member of the "Star Trek" cast to commit atrocities to vinyl. If you are completely deranged you can purchase the album "Space Out - The Very Best of Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner".

In one review on Amazon by customer Kevin Cook he says, "Star Trek's" William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy, whose insatiable TV-star egos pushed them to record music and monologues that transcend mere mediocrity and ineptitude, constituting an alien art form that defies earthly description. Whatever it is, it's the best of it, or the worst, depending upon your point of view. You'll love it passionately, like I do, or you'll despise it with every fibre of your being, like my wife does. There's no middle ground here".

If you are completely beyond help you can also purchase music by Brent Spiner, Nichelle Nichols, Robert Picardo, Tim Russ, Scott Bakula and Nana Visitor. George Takei can be found singing "On The Road Again" on YouTube. Some of them were singers before appearing in "Star Trek" but that is no excuse, listen to them at your own risk.

Question submitted by shipyardbernie

Answer: Cliff Richard

"Whenever God Shines His Light" is the opening track on Van Morrison's 1989 album "Avalon Sunset". It was released as a single in the run up to Christmas 1989 and managed to reach number three on the Irish charts, but only number 20 on the UK charts. It didn't chart anywhere else.

Despite being a hardline atheist, I do appreciate religious zeal in music, such as Rastafarian Nyahbinghi, American gospel, and Norwegian black metal. However, Van and Cliff's ditty annoys me as it seems that the Christian message is all that matters and they totally forgot about artistic expression, in either the lyrics or the music. It's twee, and to my ears there is nothing worse in music.

All the red herrings have had Christmas number ones in the UK.

Question submitted by thula2.

Answer: Suzi Quatro

"Can The Can" was written by Nicky Chinn/Mike Chapman. It was number one for one week on the UK singles chart for Suzi Quatro in 1973. It peaked at number 56 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1976.

Singer/bass guitarist Suzi Quatro was born Susan Kay Quatrocchio in Detroit, Michigan, USA, in 1950. She was unknown (at least not famous) in America when brought to England in 1971 by record producer Mickie Most. Her first single "Rolling Stone" only made it in Portugal where it was a number one hit.

She was a support act on a 1972 Slade tour, and in 1973 her second single, "Can The Can", hit the top spot in the UK. Here are some of the lyrics:

"Make a stand for your man honey, try to can the can
Put your man in the can honey, get him while you can
Can the can, can the can, if you can, well can the can"

According to Nicky Chinn, the words "Can The Can" mean something that is pretty impossible. You can't get one can inside another if they are the same size. So we are saying you can't put your man in the can if he is out there and not willing to commit. What twaddle! I rest my case.

Musically she was far more successful elsewhere than in her homeland and apart from some minor hits, she only had one Top 40 hit on the Billboard Hot 100 with "Stumblin' In", a duet with Chris Norman which peaked at number four in 1979. It peaked at number 41 on the UK singles chart in 1978. She later went into acting and played the character Leather Tuscadero, the younger sister of Fonzie's girlfriend Pinky Tuscadero in the TV show "Happy Days". She was offered a Leather Tuscadero spin-off but refused, not wanting to be typecast.

Question submitted by shipyardbernie

Answer: Kenny Rogers

Kenny Rogers had his first major hit in 1977 with this single, and it was the first of many major hits for him after leaving the group The First Edition. The song was written by Hal Bynum and Roger Bowling, and was inspired by something that happened to Bynum in his own life. The song reached number one on the Billboard Country singles chart and number five on the Billboard Hot 100 and later that year made number one on the UK Singles chart.

The song tells the sad story narrated by a man who is talking to a woman in a bar in Toledo when her husband walks up to the woman and says "It's a fine time to leave me Lucille, with four hungry children and a crop in the field". Once the husband has left, the woman and the narrator go to a hotel room, but the words of the sad husband haunt him and he has a change of heart towards the woman.

Kenneth Rogers was born in Houston, Texas, on 21 August 1938. He is a singer-songwriter, record producer, actor and author. He has sold more than 130 million records and is one of the highest selling artists. He went into acting and made several motion pictures and made-for-TV movies. He has won many Awards and honours, including many American Music Awards, several Grammy Awards, and he has been inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame. Some of his many number one hits are "Daytime Friends", "Love of Somebody", "The Gambler", "She Believes in Me", and "You Decorated My Life". He has been divorced and married at least five times.

Question submitted by wenray.

Answer: California

"(How Much Is) That Doggie In The Window" was written by Bob Merrill. How could a lyricist responsible for writing songs such as "People" and "Don't Rain On My Parade" for the film "Funny Girl" (starring Barbra Streisand) write such tripe as this?

There have been a number of recordings of the song, but the original version was a number one hit for Patti Page on the Billboard chart in 1953. It sold in excess of two million copies. It peaked at number nine on the UK singles chart the same year and was her only chart hit in the UK. Ten years later in 1963 it was a number 69 hit on the Billboard Hot 100 for Baby Jane & The Rockabyes, which did not chart in the UK.

UK singer Lita Roza was persuaded against her better judgement to record the song by Decca records A&R man Dick Rowe (the guy later credited with turning down The Beatles after their Decca records audition). She finally agreed to record it but said that she would never sing it again and did it in one take. It was number one for one week on the UK singles chart in 1953.

In spite of disliking the song, she achieved three UK chart landmarks with it. She was the first British woman to top the UK singles chart, the first singer from Liverpool to top the UK singles chart and the first singer to top the UK singles chart with a question song.

Question submitted by shipyardbernie

Answer: The B-52s

"Shiny Happy People" was released as a single in 1991 and did quite well. Its top chart position was number two on the Irish singles Chart.

I'm not a fan of R.E.M. at the best of times and to me the cringe-worthy irony of this song really sums up Michael Stipe's smugness. Apparently, Stipe himself is anything but proud of this song and has been quoted as saying he hates it. Who am I to argue?

Pierson appeared on several tracks on the album "Out of Time", from which "Shiny Happy People" is taken. I must admit I don't get The B-52s either, but they don't anger me enough to get a question of their own.

Question submitted by thula2.